Movies That Didn’t Actually Happen • Page 76

just friends is good

 

This will definitely be an entry. It’s so bland and ends with the one-two punch of a character standing on the street and after a bus zips by in the foreground, they’ve disappeared, followed by the “Samantha Bee” theme song.

 

don’t look up will be here shortly

 

hey now - that Peaches song is great.

 

if a film has an exhausting week-and-a-half-plus long twitter d*scourse (one that, as of now, is still fairly fresh in plenty of other people's minds,) there's no question it occurred

 

as far as 355 goes, i'm kinda surprised there were even press screenings. those definitely didn't happen (ha!) around my area, not to my knowledge anyway. that said, there a thread for that movie in case anyone in there was convinced this january film from (as the poster points out) the studio that brought you jason bourne is still worth rolling the dice on omicron for

 

what percentage of films that this thread applies to have those two bolded words in their trailers/posters? or just released in that month

 

They polled us last month to see if we wanted to a screening or just watch a link. I think it was overwhelmingly voted to send us a link because no movie is worth it, especially a January release from “The Dark Phoenix” guy. I also love “From the studio that brought you ‘Jason Bourne,’” if taken literally, just translates to me as “From the studio that brought you that shitty, unnecessary fourth ‘Bourne’ film that no one should consider canon.”

 

It is, but it’s always gonna be that “Samantha Bee” song from now on.

 

not that jason bourne happened either

haha, but really, it's clear how much that film suffered from not having one of the bourne novels to build off of, and i like quite a few of paul greengrass' movies outside of the trilogy. and yeah, no reason to watch that one if you saw the other three. the obligatory moby song in the credits will not arrive soon enough

 

I have had this movie in my Netflix queue for well over 18 months.

 

it's from the dude who made The Greasy Strangler (the best movie of all time)

 

It's the reason I have a list and I won't back down I'm right

 

The IMDB page for Bruce Willis is a goldmine for this thread.

 

idk a single one of the listed costars on those posters. not a one.

 

Lol OMG. Just look at his body of work since 2010.

 

John Cusack's also in that same conversation. This is his latest, with Emile Hirsch, who relegated himself to this kind of stuff after attacking a female film exec.

 

Chad Michael Murray?!

 

Completely forgot about "Motherless Brooklyn," a movie WB gave a hard push for Oscar consideration.

 

of course one shady dude produces all those Bruce Willis movies The King of the Geezer Teasers

 

not knowing who CMM is should be seen as an enviable quality

 

It's like a continuation of the JCVD movies from the 90s