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William Ryan Key Band • Page 12

Discussion in 'Music Forum' started by earthlight, Apr 23, 2018.

  1. supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    It’s not rubbing in to say I hear your apology and I don’t accept it.
    I genuinely don’t understand what me not accepting his apology has to do with...any of you.

    In the past, he has responded a LOT more rudely to fans, publicly, than I have here but I guess it’s more fun to police a woman’s tone than unpack that fact. But I guess because he said sorry so politely I am expected to just forgive and forget that lmao
     
  2. supernovagirl Jun 29, 2020
    (Last edited: Jun 29, 2020)
    supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    Also stop acting like I’m just a hater. Before he even came in I said good for him for starting a patreon bc it seems perfect for where he’s at rn.
    I also said I genuinely hope that he had changed the way he said, and that I wish him the best

    stop acting like I’m this heartless bitch just relentlessly attacking him because I’m not.

    I’m not coming from a place of hate. I’m coming from a place of having loved that band with my whole damn heart and being repeatedly disappointed to the point where I was ashamed and had to distance myself and speak up about it. I genuinely think that sort of feedback is valuable for someone trying to live a public life. I truly and sincerely hope that Ryan is able to really understand the effects of his past behavior and of course I hope he’s able to do better in the future.
     
  3. supernovagirl Jun 29, 2020
    (Last edited: Jun 29, 2020)
    supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    Someone saying your tone is unnecessary, online, where there literally is no tone is something that only happens to women but go off I thought you were done with this conversation for the night.

    literally does not need to be any more back and forth with me about this, as this never had anything to do with..any of you.
     
  4. BirdPerson

    fuck tammy! Prestigious

    This post is weird on several levels, I gotta tell you. Like if you're going for de-escalation, you're doing the opposite. You've just called someone a racist bully, with no receipts, in the same breath about not wanting to succumb to bias

    And using her first name like that when it's not in her profile and was not being used in conversation at all in here is borderline creepy, dude
     
  5. earthlight

    Trusted Supporter

    Well said.

    Speaking of Big If, I was so glad that some of those songs made Yellowcard records. Some of those songs were absolute rippers
     
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  6. PolarBlare

    Regular Supporter

    I was so glad Empty Street made a YC record, and Triple Please is an incredible song. Really so many of those songs are great.
     
    .K. likes this.
  7. pbueddi

    Trusted

    Good to see we are back talking about a band we love.

    I'll also throw out that I love "Wretched Heart" that he did when he first launched his kickstarter.
     
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  8. earthlight

    Trusted Supporter

    I thought that song was really good, too. I still play that one pretty regularly in addition to the EP’s.

    I also love that demo “A Desert, An Ocean Floor” that was on Mendez’s website for a while. Very interesting sounds throughout that song, and the chorus is really catchy.
     
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  9. earthlight

    Trusted Supporter

    Every time I go back to those songs, I am pleasantly surprised at how they stood the test of time. “Triple Please” and “Always Almost” are two of my favorites. “Bunny and Me” is so, so good also.

    While parts of “Bug Light” became “Awakening”, I still listen to the former quite often for that absolutely ripping bridge.
     
  10. .K.

    Trusted Prestigious

    I had compiled a massive playlist of everything I had from Ryan’s career of released music and from every project he was part of. Listened to them all a lot.

    Those Big If... demos filled a huge void when Yellowcard went on hiatus. So many songs had a similar vibe, like Empty Street and Triple Please. The Will and the Whiskeymen demos have been added right in after self titled because they work in so well. The acoustic solo EP’s just put me in a relaxed head space.

    Hopefully after 12 months of the Patreon Ryan compilies the new music as a release (and I hope other Patreon bands do as well).

    And I hold out hope that someday a Yellowcard “Here I Am Alive” with Patrick from Fall Out Boy mp3 shows up in my inbox. I won’t share it, I won’t talk it, but I’ll give it the many we’ll deserved listens I know it should have earned.
     
  11. earthlight

    Trusted Supporter

    The levels to which this speaks to my soul cannot be understated.
     
    .K. likes this.
  12. .K.

    Trusted Prestigious

    There is a shared love and appreciation for this band.
     
  13. K0ta

    wrap yourself in petals for armor.

    Truthfully y'all on here wanna talk about accountability but make big passes on artists/bands you like....

    @supernovagirl doesn't make passes for artists simply because she loves them. She will actually hold artists accountable and not look for any little way out of doing so. An apology is often not enough and considered the bare minimum, we talk about this in the accountability thread, and while what ryan has done isn't quite to the level of much of what we talk about in there...it's also clear he hasn't treated the very people that have given him a career well. I for one commend her for actually following her beliefs and calling out the people who are often the hardest to call out (the ones we like).
     
  14. earthlight

    Trusted Supporter

    I’m so curious as to exactly what went down that would cause a label to block Patrick from being on a song. That kind of stuff is so frustrating to hear, I can only imagine how frustrating it must be for the band.

    Speaking of which, I have been absolutely burning Southern Air these past few days. That record holds up *so* well. Such a contagious energy to each of those songs.
     
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  15. K0ta

    wrap yourself in petals for armor.

    yeah with good reason, that happens a lot here. I say as a woman myself :)
     
  16. K0ta

    wrap yourself in petals for armor.

    Ah yes, this is the part where you act all affronted because a woman talked about what was making her uncomfortable, allowing you to simply dismiss her entire argument and the substance of it based on that alone.

    The fact that you feel the need to argue with me, about her, and her use of "tone policing" really says a lot. Just move on.
     
  17. Fucking Dustin

    Please click "like" Supporter

    I feel like for two people who don't know each other this feels like the much heavier accusation
    I think in these instances it's good to recognize that the conversation isn't about you and let the involved parties say their pieces*, and I don't think there's anything wrong with what @williamryankey said or what @supernovagirl said in response. It could've been left at that and no one else had to get involved and say/imply that what @supernovagirl said was invalid/unnecessary (which is just not true)


    * - I recognize the contradiction in me saying that but also stepping in, but given that multiple friends became involved in this I felt the need to say something
     
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  18. Garrett

    i tore a hole in the fabric of time Moderator

    I deleted a lot from my original post, which probably surprises everyone. I landed on including our history because I wanted to make two points:

    1) I'm not over-reacting and banning you or warning you or anything. Asking you to just step away was supposed to just be a polite thing to do despite bias wanting me to just ban you. I won't deny that I don't like you.

    And, in some respects, it worked. I moved your total vitriol to me and away from the redudant conversation heading down an escalating path, haha. I'm big enough to take it, and the group of people you've gotten involved, because I don't really care what you think about me.

    2) You have a noted history on the site of relentlessly attacking people, so I was countering that argument with the example that I am well aware of the most. After all, I was one of the targets.

    In hindsight, neither of these things got across. However, I also landed on if I hadn't included this paragraph, I don't think you would've reacted in any other way than the way that you did. I've seen this play out too many times in your interactions on here.

    But I will apologize for including it. I'm guessing you won't accept it, but that's not really going to cause me to lose any sleep. @Fucking Dustin let me know that it probably would've been good to also include asking the others involved to stop egging you on. I can see how this would be right and my bias probably did stop me from including them. I'm sorry I didn't address everyone equally.

    And yet, it was this exact position that ran off a POC contributor. You are the only one to blame there. If you're striving for diversity on a website, don't run off the diverse members by speaking for them. That's the definition of performative ally-ship. Especially once the information was made clear that the work was intrinsic with helping with understanding their own mental health.

    Also, Lizzo was on the list. She's more than just a rapper, but it's in her wheelhouse. It was a disingenuous grandstanding point from the start in response to a friend of yours being banned (for like three days) from the site.

    Because it was speculated, reports stay visible for 24 hours even after they're closed. But guess what, they're open. I don't have anything to hide. I did originally leave them for others, but no one stepped up as things began to escalate. I was awake, so I responded.

    Other mods have seen it by now, and we are leaving it for @Jason Tate to handle. (Sorry, bud.)

    I don't have to provide receipts for the fact that she ran off a POC contributor to the site in her reaction to the Best of 2019 list. It's a noted fact. She was even told this and doubled down on the fact that Jason should've censored his list for "optics." Which is even worse than just having a white rapper on the list. All the posts are there. Every writer and mod on this site knows it. Half the people liking these post were there and know it. It was a shitstorm.

    It's really not creepy to know someone's name when at one point you were Facebook friends. And when names are used across this site with frequency. It's not like I went searching for the information because I didn't know.



    I wasn't going to respond, but Dustin asked me to. He's the person I care about most on this site, so I want to respect his wishes. This is the best I can do. I'm sure there will be other responses, but I'm probably not going to respond to those. I've said everything I need to say and stand by it. I made a few mistakes along the way, but I've owned those. I know how to walk away once that has been done.
     
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  19. supernovagirl Jun 30, 2020
    (Last edited: Jun 30, 2020)
    supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    The fact that this happened at all in this thread and in this context is WILDLY Inappropriate

    that’s all I’m going to say. Like I’m truly shocked that you’re laying out a bunch of stuff from 8 months ago and using it to paint me as a bad person in defense of your completely inappropriate action as a moderator.

    if it were up to me Both posts from garret as well as my response would be erased from this thread because it was totally inappropriate to happen here to begin with

    furthermore @Garrett do not for a second pretend to “know” how I would react. I have never ONCE been approached for my posts being reported or talked to in any capacity so no you don’t know how I would react to that. You are again basing your entire view of me based on ONE day 8 months ago. A day in which I stand by regardless of you dismissing it as performative allyship or not.

    if it’s such an issue that apparently sooo many people know that I just “relentlessly attack people”...why has no one ever approached me about that? Why is the first I’m hearing of it in a thread in which OTHERS were attacking ME?
    How is any of that remotely reasonable
     
  20. GrantCloud

    Prestigious Prestigious

    I mean.... y’all kinda did
     
  21. oncenowagain

    “the whole world’s ending” “honey it already did” Prestigious

    Genuinely trying to find the point at which @supernovagirl personally came after y’all before someone tried to paint her as hateful

    to me, it just looks like a bunch of insecure people who took personal offense to her standing her ground and tried to smear her for it
     
  22. K0ta

    wrap yourself in petals for armor.

    I understand what you're saying. What *I'm* saying is that you ignored all the context of not only my post, but hers, when you responded to me to mention that she called y'all out for how you were talking to her. You did not engage with any point that I made, that was simply all you mentioned. And now you're saying YOU'RE uncomfortable? Imagine how uncomfortable it is for her when it's a constant battle to not only have your voice heard, but to have to constantly side-step the casual misogyny of this site.

    I did not intend to engage in a back and forth about tone policing when I stepped in to say that she had every right to hold Ryan as accountable as she holds other artists, and to voice that opinion as strongly as she wanted. It's y'all that aren't allowing that voice to be expressed and instead are doubling down and acting offended at the audacity of a woman to suggest she is being tone policed.

    It's just interesting that there are high level people on this site who have been more aggressive and rude to people (with far less provocation and reason) than @supernovagirl at times, but that's all okay. As a woman on this site, being ganged up on by men is practically a daily occurrence depending on the thread you go in. If a woman feels she is being tone policed, acting immediately defensive is not going to bring about a productive conversation. We talk all the time on this site about accountability but many on here refuse to do the bare minimum and have the conversations. The way this entire thread has played out is living proof of that.
     
  23. supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    @K0ta i love you I love you I love you

    thank you for saying what’s been weighing on my mind and more. Thank you for using your voice to strengthen other women’s even when you don’t necessarily agree with them, thank you for always validating my experiences as a woman on this website and thank you for holding others accountable
     
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  24. .K.

    Trusted Prestigious

    I recommend using the Block Member feature. I have no idea whom or what’s been posted, but I know it’s from a member that I feel has crossed a line in terms of the way they have attacked myself or other people in the forums.

    Its great for people to discuss their opinions. We are all different and have different points of view which we are often very passionate about. But when some crosses the line of attacking or bullying you in a thread, just BLOCK THEM. There doesn’t have to be a right or wrong. Some people’s intentions in using the threads may be very different than yours.

    I’m still up for discussing Yellowcard and related projects. I feel like Ryan addressed a variety of topics in his post that could generate a lot of good conversation about a wide variety of topics.

    Also, Triple Please should have made its way on a Yellowcard record too. It definitely deserved a proper release as well.
     
  25. K0ta

    wrap yourself in petals for armor.

    Lmao at @.K. , the user who literally tone policed me in the Taylor Swift thread when I spoke about the feelings she was having as a woman in the music industry and then blocked me, to come here and say I am the one who crosses lines.