Vent Your Frustrations • Page 69

My periods use to be really heavy, then I went on birth control to lighten them which helped. Don’t remember how bad my cramps use to be. I just want to not be tired all the time

 

My birth control addressed a lot of my symptoms but I also wish someone would've been like hey these symptoms are ridic let's get to the casue?? Cause nobody did and I feel like I can't be on bc for the rest of my life or until I go on menopause I guess? Cause my periods are so bad i legit wouldnt even consider going off of it to have a kid because the thought of that taking a while to happen and having to endure my old symptoms in the meantime sounds torturous. My symptoms are getting a lil worse than they used to be on bc too, tho not as bad as before

 

I refuse to go off birth control until menopause lol I am not having 3-month long periods again. NOPE. Not doing it lol Plus I'm basically bed-ridden for days bc my cramps are so bad I just lay there in a ball and cry with my heating pad on. I don't even know what else I would do?? Like I know there are some surgeries for endo but my dr basically told me if the pill is working, stick with it. But like I said above, she hasn't exactly been great lately so idk.

 

I had really horrible periods before the pill but the pill also made my depression worse and made me gain a lot of weight, which made me feel really bad about myself. I just switched to an IUD- which might be helpful to you all, if you haven’t considered it! I spoke with my doctor about it extensively and they often recommend Mirena to women with awful, heavy periods and symptoms made worse by the pill because the hormone dosage is much smaller and localized, so it’s not supposed to impact your moods the same way. It also can make your period just stop entirely for years because it thins the lining of your uterus to stop implantation. Fair warning though, getting it put in was VERY painful- but I think in the long run, very worth it.

 

I’m done helping people because they just take it the wrong way and get mad.

 

The fact that people are suddenly pretending to care about heroin addiction just because Demi Lovato overdosed makes me physically sick. I've seen so many talking shit about heroin addicts and now all of a sudden they're making mushy statuses about how much they care. Where the fuck were you when my sister nearly died from overdosing? Or my ex-girlfriend? Or many of my other friends? You sat there running your mouth basically saying they deserve to die and that it's their fault when you don't know the slightest thing about how addiction even works because you've been so pampered and catered to your entire life and have never had to suffer anything. Fuck you.

Not surprisingly, a lot of these same people pretended to care about depression and suicide when Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade killed themselves when they literally just made me feel like a massive inconvenience when I was suffering from such severe depression that hanging myself felt like it'd be my only relief or escape.

 

Tomorrow will be a week since the wife left. We're going to meet up and talk about whether or not she wants to stay in this thing. I have not gotten any indication from her that she wants to. I'm dreading the conversation.

 

I posted this to FB today but I also thought I would post here to get some unbiased independent reaction/ feedback:

I don't "share" in this manner often and I've actually been avoiding FB more lately but this felt important to recount. There's a LOT of detail here because A) I am long winded and B) these details, I feel, are important. TL;DR at the end.
My wife will attest to the fact that I am a very "it's not a big deal/ everything will work out in the end" - TO A FAULT. I mean, I almost never sweat anything. While I do get *passionate* about things, I rarely "care" about the bad stuff that happens in life. That said, I had a moment today that'll stick with me for a while.
I have posted in the past about my lunchtime walks - I try to do 2.5 miles every day after lunch - which have been fewer and farther between as of late due to the heat. I have really missed that "me time," so today I decided to make up for it and get out there for at LEAST one "lap." (I do 2 around the office-adjacent neighborhood.)
I cherish this time because it’s very much “me time," when I can catch up on my podcasts and zone out from work and life for 40 minutes or so. On my walks, I stick to the shade as much as I can to avoid the sun and heat. I also have weird ticks that I indulge in like rolling the knuckles on my right hand against the walls with every stride and stretching and working out my fingers on my left hand - in the event I ever need to jump back into playing bass at a moments notice, i guess? All this is to say - I REALLY stay out of the way of anything and everything.
50% of my walk takes place in the alley ways along Victory and Alameda boulevards in Burbank. I see a lot of the same people day in and day out. I have a couple horses I like to say “Hi” to when they’re out and about. I have always been acutely aware of my surroundings and, 2 years in, it’s a pretty safe endeavor. Today, however, I was nearly hit by a speeding car that came from behind me.
The photo attached here is where it happened. Like I said, I stay close to and roll my knuckles against the wall and Shiloh, one of the horses I like to say “hi” to, is just beyond this telephone pole. No matter how much I would love to, I cannot walk through walls let alone telephone poles, so unfortunately for this driver, apparently, I had to slightly enter the alley way. Again, I love rolling my knuckles (which I am sure is a terrible habit but it’s better than biting them which I was doing for a while) on anything I can while I walk, so I am close enough to the pole to do that and STILL, I felt a bump on my left arm from the right side view mirror of the car behind me.
Now sure, I had headphones in. It could be said that this is dangerous, but I have been doing this for 2 years and have always heard any oncoming traffic behind me. This person was SPEEDING down the alley. Not only that, they were speeding down the alley seemingly with their left tires in the gutter that goes down the middle. This would be fine if there were another car parked on the opposite side, or MAYBE if there weren’t someone walking up ahead. I am not of small stature. I can’t imagine I wasn’t noticed. You’d think even a novice driver would be scared of hitting someone with their car therefore staying VERY wide. Not saying it was intentional, but goddamn if it wasn't reckless.
I am not really sure why I am posting all of this. I really didn’t think much about it for the first few minutes. However, I eventually kept thinking about how easy going I am. I mean, OVER AND OVER again I kept thinking about it with regard to what had just happened, and I knew that it was more than just “a thing.” This really shook me, and even though I didn’t gesture at the car or really react at ALL right then, this is a feeling I will likely never forget. While writing this, I am thinking back to my 2006 car accident and how I have thought about it at least once a day since then. That was FAR more impressionable in that there were sights and smells that went along with that memory. This was just a VERY slight tap and a burst of wind, but that driver today didn’t even slow down - much like the events surrounding my car accident in which my car was struck by a hit and run driver that probably had no idea I rolled off the freeway entirely.
Not knowing what to do now other than what I usually do which is to downplay it until I forget it, I thought I would write this out. I’ll probably walk tomorrow. Hell, that near-miss was on my first lap today and I still did the second lap. And on that second lap I thought about how, if I were hit by that car, I doubt the driver would have stopped. What if I had been pulled under the wheels? Would I have moved my head quickly enough not to be run over? Would I have survived? Who would have checked on me and how long would it have taken? When would Suzi have found out? Would Wes have remembered me? What was the last thing I posted on social media?
I guess I felt I needed to establish some kind of reminder of this incident for the next time I downplay something that really shouldn’t be. Why? Not sure. Just felt like it needed to be done.
TL;DR - I was nearly hit by a car today on my walk and it kind of shook me.

 

Man - I am so sorry to hear this. I really hope for the best from your meeting.

 

Tired of doing everything at work. The guy I work with some times does minimal work and I’m doing everything else. I tell him “hey we need to be doing this” and the response is always “I know but I’m just resting for a few minutes” then it leaves me to keep doing it. I let him take care of the male clients and I take care of the female which is twice as many people. So he should be helping out more. It’s so irritating

Edit: rn he continues to ignore the mess of dishes in the kitchen and I’m going to get stuck doing it. (Angry face)

 

I'm sick of myself. Telling myself for years I'm going to change. That I want to have goals and pursue them, but there's nothing I care enough about to go out of my way to do. I'm lazy and hate putting in effort. I'm scared of failure. I want to know how to muster up the strength to be a better person.

 

Not a frustration this time but didn’t know where else to post. Dental office called and wanted to change my appointment. Luckily it’s not early in the morning like last time. I asked the office manager if it will still be covered by insurance since it’s about a week earlier and she checked and said they have me down for my last visit a year ago. I mentioned how last time I came in she was out sick and the system was down and a student took down my info. I guess they never billed the insurance because I was told they’d call me if any problems. I’ve been a patient there for a long time and they’re prettt good about things. So if I “owe” money they’d make sure I don’t have to pay anything because it’s their fault.

 

I was stabbed near my knee with a pencil in 5th or 6th grade (around 15 years ago) and I still have a grey mark underneath my skin.

I also feel old because my spine has been sore in two spots ever since someone bumped into me while go-cart racing 5 days ago.

 

My sister stabbed me with a pencil in the wrist probably also around 15 years ago or more, and I had a grey mark until I got a tattoo that ended up covering it lol.

 

I hate being a light sleeper. I cannot sleep with the air conditioner on because it keeps me up. I think if it was consistently on it'd be better but having it go off and on throughout the night sux. I guess I could get a fan but now this is becoming too much effort.

 

I work in produce so we are always having to throw away produce since it gets bad/bruised. We used to donate to the local food banks but then they started getting more strict with what is allowed.

I would then have customers always jokingly be like "oh you should clearance all this produce i am sure it would be a hit"

I always have to smile and nod but like internally i am like SKDSLLKSJLDJl I hear this so much and it is such a bad idea because people would come back and complain to us if they didn't realize it was bad becuase the outside still looked ok.

 

Just love when I go out to eat somewhere and ask if what I'm ordering is vegetarian just to make sure, the waitress goes and asks the cook and comes back and assures me it is. Then the next time I'm there my friend who is now vegetarian asks and they say oh no, we use beef broth in that. So I've been eating it this entire time and it's not even vegetarian!?!? Good thing I don't like have a food allergy or something. This has happened to me so many times and it's really frustrating. I thought well maybe people don't think about beef/chicken broth so I've even starting asking if that is in it only to find out they said no but really it's in there Jealous of people who have vegan restaurants and vegetarian-friendly restaurants near them.

 

Yeah I think that's happened to me too. We dont have veg friendly restaurants either so I just assume a risk every time I eat out that it may not be legit veggie which sux. But I think ur right and people dont consider things like broth

 

I’m having a hell of a time finding a new job. I’ve had a few people reach out to me about setting up a time to talk but I’ve gotten no responses after sending my availability. I’ve followed up a few times but I don’t want to appear desperate. I have another interview set up for sometime this week and I’m really hoping I don’t get ghosted again. I’ve also just started using Ziprecruiter and I remember why I didn’t use it last time I was job searching, it’s all pyramid schemes. I hope something comes up soon.

 

My manager is very unorganized. We never have what we need available. I’m desperate enough to apply for jobs in the same field just at a different location/company. Trying to move in occtober. Same time trying to take a dental assist course but that might have to wait until the beginning of new year

 

I have chocolate brownie cheesecake.

Which means at some point, possibly soon, I won't have chocolate brownie cheesecake.

I'm freaking out.

 

There are young girls talking loudly and like cackling and screeching in the next room and I'm like yall. Some of us are olds and have to work in the morning STAWP. It's not even 10pm yet I'm just a square ok.

 

What city do you live in? I work for an app called YourLocal that fights food waste by partnering with businesses who have excess food such as baked goods and juices and we're trying to expand our partnerships! We've just launched in NYC and are based out of Denmark. There's also Misfit Juicery who make juice from misshapen/bruised produce!

 

Saw someone wearing a Receiving End of Sirens "The Earth Sings Mi Fa Mi" shirt tonight in Brooklyn and after I was like "oh em gee!" she said, "they're a band, right?"

 

It's Lollapalooza weekend here in Chicago. And while I'll be part of the problem, it can be highly frustrating having so many people downtown.