Man a lot of this sounds like me 5 years ago. My son didn’t sleep or eat. And he actually would never let me put him to sleep or soothe him. This caused my wife to have a lot of resentment toward me. We always fought. Never any accusations of cheating but definitely talk of splitting. We both withdrew to our phones. For the sleeping, the only thing I can say is it seems like you kind of know already what to do. You gotta set that routine and stick to it. Eventually it will catch on but in our case it took a very long time. But it sounds like your wife isn’t wanting to work with you on that at this point. The biggest thing is finding a way to get on the same page. I am barely finding time for myself to this day. I never get to watch tv, I have to watch on my phone or iPad cuz my kid and wife have priority on that and we only have one tv. I used to be into playing video games but I rarely do that unless I’m playing a game for/with my son. So I play breath of the wild all day because that’s all he ever wants to do. I used to play guitar and be into photography and I’m starting to be able to mess around a little more. The biggest thing is trying to decide what I want to do with the little time I have. I work full time, need to sleep but sometimes I sacrifice that to be able to watch a show or go to the gym or just do anything. And then when I do have time I get paralyzed by choices and end up doing nothing. All I can say is it can get better but both have to put in the work and make sacrifices. It took a lot of ups and downs, even as recent as about six months ago I wasn’t sure if our relationship was gonna last. But something snapped in her and she really started putting in the effort and I started doing the same. Currently my wife and I are probably in the best spot in our relationship since before we got married 6 years ago. Good luck.