The Eternal Cringe Thread • Page 2

Luckily the place is a 3 minute walk from Laura's so I'll only ever see him again all the damn time

 

Haha, either he thought you wanted another shake, or he was trolling.

 

He was definitely trolling

 

" Hi I'm Dustin from chorus"

 

Make it happen

 

You can be in the band too

 

On Fat Tuesday several years ago, my college roommates and I were having some sort of better-than-average dinner that I had a part in making. To let everyone know that the food was ready, I authored a text to the group that read, "Happy Fat Tuesday you dirty bunch of fucks." Except to my horror, I texted my mom lolol. Immediately called right after to preemptively explain the text she was going to receive and that it was decidedly not meant for her. Thankfully all group chats are now in GroupMe so that problem is taken care of.

 

Not really a story but here's a picture I cringe at whenever it somehow resurfaces every few years. This was a band I was in in 2007 (I was 17). I had been in others but never cared about doing press photos or doing the whole "myspace" thing until then. So this was one of the very first promos we did and my teenage inflated ego shows. I really wasn't that douchey but legit just thought I'd look like the coolest if I did this. It was like, "first promos, gotta look super cool!!" Instead everyone just looks really normal and I'm like professor hardass over here. Or like I'm too stoned to keep my eyes open. Idk why no one told me to knock it off lol

If the backstory wasn't enough to give it away, I'm the one in the rainbow pullover

 

I would've checked ur band out on Purevolume!!

 

Top tier post here. Wonderfully done.

 

One time my brother accidentally jizzed on my dog

 

2007 me would've said something like "Hey!! Thanks for checking out our band, it totes means sooooo much to us! Are you coming to our show next Saturday? You should! We love you!!!!" or whatever all the much cooler neon bands were saying at the time

And now I'm cringing at hypothetical past me

 

-I used to be on Neopets when I was a youngin and thought I was v edgy. My little page had anti-bush things and a burning American flag and my username was like good_Charlotte_rox my_sox or something. So there's that.

-I've also discussed how my old diary is basically me saying the world would be a better place if we all just listened to what Jello Biafra had to say. He was my introduction to politics and my lil tween mind was blown and I legitimately was so sure and emotional that Jello had the answers. Like I'd cry over this u guys.

-I was a huge awkward nerd (if this hasn't already been established) and I was at a show once and thought this group of ppl were rly cool. It was so hot that ppl were using their water bottles to mist water onto ppl in the crowd. I thought I'd be cool and do it to that group, but i ended up dumping the water straight on their heads. I heard them say "did she do that on purpose?" And I like ran outta there

My entire adolescence was a cringe fest

 

I once tried to sell shampoo to a woman who lost her hair in chemo, which she was currently going to.

 

I cringe at my entire existence.

 

I almost said something really cringey tonight. I had just watched my friend's band play and we were talking outside after when one of his other friends gave him a high five and told him "great job on guitar" and then gave me one joking "great job listening" to which I almost instinctively, and sarcastically said " oh ya, that was the hard part" in front of all his bandmates who I'd just met. I caught it last moment and just lamely said "that was the easy part".

 

This thread is great.

So, 2004...my friends and I were seriously the first group of "scene kids" to arise at my high school. No, that's not the cringiest part..

One day a friend of ours came to my buddy and I and said that some freshman had been spouting off on xanga about the love triangle she was involved in with "Chris and ryan from Alice Drive." (Cringe worthy band name). We went home and printed out her entire xanga page. It was all about how she was dating me for the past year even though my addiction to heroin had been spiraling out of control..(had never even touched alcohol or pot at this time in my life). Then one post went on to say that she couldn't watch me throw my life away anymore so she left me for my best friend ryan. It was all v brutal to read. The next day someone pointed out to us who she was and we literally slammed the print out on the lunch table and asked her what the fuck she was doing. God we were such assholes. This poor girls face turned the brightest shade of red I've ever seen and she left the caf bawling. We were so blind to mental health issues at the time so this still kind of haunts me to this day.

But it's not over...over the next few weeks she began to show up at our lockers and would just stand there asking us what happened in our relationship...she also showed up by herself to my friends house and just stood there. WTFFFF. My friend and I finally went to our counselor and told her the situation. The counselor then called this girl IN WITH US for peer mediation...ughhhh I'm getting weird thinking about it. She just sat there red as an apple.

Anyways, it pretty much ended after that. Ran into someone last year who told me she's married and doing well now...I guess that's good.

 

I love this thread

I've pretty much repressed most of my cringe moments, if I remember any I'll post them

 

This post could have just ended at xanga and it still would have brought the second hand embarrassment. Tragic times.

 

i found my old middle school and high school xanga accounts a few years ago randomly when talking about it with my ex and immediately did everything i could to get it taken down

 

My face in this picture of Matt Theissen and 17-year-old me could shatter 1,000 mirrors.

 

I had TWO xanga's. One my friends knew about and another one that was super cool and cryptic with a bunch of bright eyes lyrics all over it.

Holy shit, I am so sorry, but I laughed pretty hard at that expression. Like, what was going on that made you grimace so much?

 

On AOL instant messenger, I didn't know you could put like "%sn" or something in your away messages to just automatically use the screen name of whoever is looking at your message and this girl I crushed hard on -- the one who's desktop background I made into a picture of tub girl because I thought that was flirting when I was 15 -- had something super passive aggressive at the time about "I can't be online when %sn is on they just drive me crazy!" and I read it and was FURIOUS and sent her like 15 messages about how I do nothing but try to impress her and that i think I love her and all this awful bullshit and then she told me that trick and I was super embarrassed.

 

Plain and simple, I was just bad at smiling in photos then and I was trying to smile as hard as I could. Legit the same problem Chandler had in Friends.

 

Worst thing about my xanga was the color scheme. Black background with blue writing and red letter box. It was so hard on the eyes. Also, "A Boy Brushed In Red" blared every time you enter the page.