I lost my fiancee on Tuesday. Please no "I'm sorry's" and I'm personally going to be okay, I'm looking for songs. I have two playlists. One that is about Persistence the other making sense of sadness. For persistence, think Origami Angel, Ace Enders, MxPx, Mowglis kind of stuff with optimism but depth. For sadness, think Right Away Great Captain, MO, ManDancing, Movements, Have Mercy, Death Cab, Underoath. I don't want just pure sadness, like definitely stay away from Aaron West and the Roaring 20's type stuff if that makes sense. Music is the only thing that makes sense to my brain right now.
I do not have much experience with loss, but I went through my library and jotted down some of the music that I gravitate toward when I am down, for a number of reasons, not necessarily lyrically. I'm Glad It's You - Silver Cord Everything from the album it's on is great (Every Sun, Every Moon) but please note that lyrically it may hit a little too close to home as the album is specifically about loss. Touché Amore - New Halloween Again, another track from another excellent album that may hit too close to home. Bigger Better Sun - When I Need It Most Great Grandpa - Mono No Aware Big Thief - Mythological Beauty The Hotelier - Soft Animal Phoebe Bridgers - I Know the End Oso Oso - Reindeer Games Cymbals Eat Guitars - Shrine The Hotelier - Ode to the Nite Ratz Club Record Setter - Sometimes Rostam - Don't Let It Get To You (Reprise) Stars Hollow - Out the Sunroof Mineral - If I Could The Weakerthans - Without Mythology The Weakerthans - Left & Leaving When I am feeling particularly low, stuff like early The Dangerous Summer and ***** New tend to help me through. I hope you find warmth in some of these tunes, and I'll try to think of some more I can share.
I'm out right now so I'm gonna circle back with a fuller playlist of recommendations for you. But "Fire and Rain" by James Taylor is usually my go to.
Thank you wisdom, added seven of those and some of them just hit it so close it's scary that I'll listen to over and over. I actually knew Tavish from Oso Oso. If you're reading this, just watch what you put into your body. We're not invincible. I'm Glad It's You, Touche Amore, Hotelier- Ratz Club, Oso Oso, Phoebe, Stars Hollow, Bigger Better Sun I went for. Nice to discover new things I wouldn't have otherwise or went back to a few I forgot were there. Thank you.
Death Cab for Cutie - "What Sara Said" Eric Clapton - "Tears in Heaven" Bleachers - "Like a River Runs" Bruce Springsteen - "Ghosts" Prince - "Sometimes It Snows in April" Mariah Carey and Boyz II Men - "One Sweet Day" Meg and Dia - "Halloween" Vince Gill - "Go Rest High on That Mountain" Garth Brooks - "If Tomorrow Never Comes" Not necessarily your preferred genre, Meg and Dia aside, but definitely what I'd be listening to.
I think the song Orange Blossoms by Half Waif would fit on your playlist. It’s helped me a lot. I don’t know if it would fit on your sad or persistent playlist. Most of the song is sad but it pivots to persistent at the end The songwriter, Nandi, wrote this about the song: “I wrote ‘Orange Blossoms’ soon after finishing The Caretaker, and in some ways, it feels like the next chapter in that story. In the fall of 2019, I found myself taking care of someone close to me who was struggling with addiction, and as a caretaker often does, I internalized that immense pain and took it on as my own. It’s paralyzing, to feel so powerless when trying to help someone you love. The song came out like an incantation, a desperate plea to be rescued from wrestling with everything. But it unfolded into something more resolute as I refocused on the task of taking responsibility for myself and my own life. The song touches on a phrase that kept coming back to me at that time, which was: ‘no one’s going to do it for you.’ You can help and be helped, you can love and be loved, but salvation is your own to seek and claim.”
The entire album “No Closer to Heaven” by The Wonder Years was huge in helping me through a friend’s death, especially the song “Cigarettes and Saints” The album “Home” by Off with their Heads was also on repeat for me during that time.
For me personally trying to come to terms with a loss was listening to this song - The Xcerts - There Is Only You For me the song took on a new meaning when I was dealing with the loss of a person in my life, and for me it cemented as a song to grieve to, but also reaffirmed that you can be happy, and enjoy life.
The Touché Amoré album Stage Four is what I listen to when I need to bash out some grief. Hope it helps you.
You probably already know this one since it features Andy Hull, but definitely "Thing With Feathers" by Every Time I Die. I think in a lot of ways it could fit both categories