(Reasons we're not having) Sex (and WoW) Thread NSFW • Page 298

Bought some groceries and condoms tonight at target, of course I get some goober bro behind me who notices and is like “THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT!” pointing at the condoms

Man people are the worst lol

 

maybe he was talking about the groceries

 

I mean maybe, cool ranch doritos are p good

 

just saw a commercial for a hose that is kink resistant btw and I'm aspiring to be that hose

 

Read this as horse and not hose.

 

forget about the gutter mikes got his head in the gd stable

 

Call me Clark Stables

 

youre on thin ice, cups.

 

Really awesome smash mouth sang about global warming before it was popular.

 

they've done more for global warming than our current government

 

Plus the lead singer is guy fieri’s brother.

Guy Fieri / Steve Harwell in 2020

 

It still isn’t popular really. Kinda fringe.

 

ftfy

 

any better luck with apps/online dating?

 

this thread seems mostly for jokes n stuff but I’m gonna take a shot in the dark and make a serious post about tinder etc

I think tinder is pretty ok for when u’ve gotten urself too socially isolated to consistently meet new people through friends (like I have lol). my sexual experiences from tinder haven’t been *that* much more depressing than my non-tinder ones... one big difference is tinder enables me to be a lot more promiscuous than I normally would be, which also means the number of uncomfortable experiences rises with the number of experiences in general. another one is that in my experience tinder flings tend to be shorter, and can make me feel disposable, whereas things have almost always lasted longer with people I meet in less skeezy contexts, although I have a penchant for dramatic breakups and I don’t know whether that’s better or worse than the disposable feeling.

I’m bisexual and in general I’d say tinder is full of awful men but some of them have felt worth pursuing for me, whereas there’s less of an overwhelming quantity of awful women or nb people, but ultimately even the best people I’ve met from tinder have been disappointing, I think, even if they’re perfectly nice, which maybe says more about me than it does about them. I’m the chronic ghoster the thinkpieces warned u about, and I’m not proud of it, but I think it comes from the place of realizing that I probably wasn’t mentally well enough to handle what was happening in the first place, and getting too anxious to try to explain that to people

I’m starting to get pretty sick of using hookups as a band-aid for a more fundamental loneliness, but at the same time I have this hopeless romantic kind of mentality where I really just wish I could find someone to truly love me, and end up looking for that in places where I rationally know it’s probably not happening. tinder is the most easily accessible place like that for me.

right now I’m kind of half-heartedly pursuing three people from tinder and I’m having this stupid experience where like... I have these good moments with them and feel like there’s a real spark, but then my mood swings end up pulling me away and bringing me to lose motivation and lower my expectations. I’m not sure what’ll happen but I have a feeling at least two of them will end up unceremoniously disappearing from my life before anything really gets off the ground. depressing, but after weathering all the breakups that I have, there’s a certain numbness to all of it that actually makes me feel safer than opening myself up to serious heartbreak, even if it’s no less misguided, and that safety is kind of fake because there’s still a certain mournfulness that kind of builds up.

tl;dr being a moody slut is hard but tinder makes it easier in some ways even as it enables me to do stuff that ultimately tends to just make me sadder

 

yeah tbh making that post has helped convince me that I should probably just give up on trying to engage with the two I’m most unsure about, also because they seem like they’re doing a similar thing, and the more it gets drawn out the worse the inevitable end will probably feel

the third one I actually think I have real feelings for, but that makes me all the more nervous. he’s also indicated that if things continued he would prefer monogamy, and even though at this point I’d probably de facto be doing that anyway, that’d turn it into more of an actual relationship than a lowkey fling, and since my last attempt at commitment like that was such a disaster, that kinda freaks me out, but I also think deep down it’s what I want. love is stupid

 

a few weeks ago I went on a date and she got me to open up about some of my fairly recent love life melodrama, and she said to my face that she thought I probably should just let myself be single for a while lmao. maybe she was right and maybe I’ll come to terms with that soon, but I’m still hurting enough that it’s not something I’ve been able to bring myself to reckon with yet

 

anyway I’m gonna listen to the new Soap&Skin album and try to keep my spirits up as I fall asleep

 

For me, dating apps have a few things that are absolute musts:

1) Be honest with where you are emotionally. You have to evaluate what you can handle, straight-up how much you actually like yourself, and if you're coming off of a low or you've pushed through that low spot in life and are able to find someone while on an upswing.

2) Be honest about your intentions because once you figure out what you can handle and where you are emotionally and mentally, you're able to identify a bit more of what you want. Is it just flings? Is it flings that you hope blossom into something more? Is it more of a stable relationship right out of the gate? Is there no real expectation and you're open to any combination of the the above. I always had to keep in mind what the 'goal' was. Was I on Tinder because I was bored by Netflix and too depressed to go outside and interface with the world? Then yeah, I need to try to force myself to be aware of that.

3) I had to stop putting so much pressure and emphasis on meeting someone and 'catching up,' so to speak. I felt like I was falling behind. After I broke up with my ex last fall, I had the worst December of my life, probably. I was sitting alone in an apartment that had ants on an over-priced, uncomfortable love seat as the only furniture I owned (apart from my bed) using cardboard boxes as tables. I lived this way for nearly five months. And when I was using dating apps from December through early April, I was putting so much pressure on myself -- both consciously and subconsciously -- to be having fun, to be out doing things with people and making friends/being with friends/or dating. Really, I was doing that because I felt miserable and thought that if I was out doing something that hey I'm not really miserable cause I'm out having a 'good time.'

I think because you can go from total isolation to on a date in a matter of minutes with dating apps, it's just VERY important to evaluate why you want to be on them, what your expectations are and what you can realistically handle. I wouldn't have been able to handle something like the relationship I'm in now had I met her in February or March. Instead, I met her in May and it's completely changed my life.

I firmly believe you cannot truly love anyone until you love yourself, as cliche and cheesy as that sounds.

 

What's your tagline under you avatar mean, Lil Moon?

 

lol no. I essentially stopped going on them, because I just don’t think they will result in what I want/need.
I realized the other day that because I didn’t really date anyone until I was 19 I sort of still have it in my head that I’ve spent much of my life single. But the reality was I had two long term relationship situations back to back, so I haven’t been effectively single in like 8 years.
Not only that, but I’ve never had short flings or casual dates or anything like that really. Everything’s been long term that I’ve been involved with.
So now here I am accepting that it’s time for me to be single especially because I want to move to Seattle after school so there’s no point in trying to create something serious here
So then part of me is like since I don’t know HOW to do short term casual dating, I should practice that now with the idea in mind that I will be moving etc.
but idk. There’s so much expectations on women in dating apps. I’m not interested in hooking up without knowing them first (but also don’t want to go the next 2 years not getting laid lol) so it makes things like...idk. More trouble than they’re worth lol

Lmao, can relate.

Also, most threads turn into mostly jokes n stuff heh but we always welcome a post getting us back on topic

 

it’s a quote from a Daoko song, 同じ夜 (Onaji Yoru / Same Night). lyricstranslate.com has the line translated as “at the mercy of a floating dream” which is a better translation than I could do as a novice Japanese learner

 

Nice. I took Japanese for a semester and loved it. Had to drop out of my second semester cause of personal reasons and I’ve forgotton nearly everything lol. I plan to move to Japan when I’m done with school though so I’ll pick it up again eventually. I absolutely adore the language.