(Reasons we're not having) Sex (and WoW) Thread NSFW • Page 243

My gf is in Chicago working ComicCon until Wednesday :/ but it's gonna be rainy/snowy here this weekend so I might just end up doing my taxes and cleaning our apartment. I also have to pick up a b-day present for her.

 

Okay Colby

 

something that’s legit a little terrifying is that she tells me to go unprotected until i get close. last night i was like “ok condom time” and she said “not yet” and like wrapped around me. inside im like “ERMMM NOT HOW IT WORKS” and just slowed down. she says it’s fine because she is very in tune with when she ovulates and precum is rarely risky etc. ok fine but i previously impregnated someone that was told she was infertile and had unprotected sex for a decade before me, and she conceived on our first time lol. gonna have to balls up and put my foot down.

 

black & white milkshake > vanilla milkshake > chocolate milkshake

imo

 

is this a sex thing?

Also, yeah, dude. if she's not on the pill, you must wrap it. wrap it good.

 

ok michael jackson

 

for the record, i am referencing his song not his actual skin color lol that joke def doesn't read how i intended

 

Uh wat? Have you not had a black & white milkshake?

 

I would not accept that as an explanation at all.

 

yes and i agree. although i would have to put chocolate peanut butter banana at the top of any milkshake list

 

she can’t be and she’s dying to be, it’s the worst. she has this blood clotting condition and they pretty much will prescribe her nothing outside of the most necessary medications when she is very sick, and it’s frustrating for her because she was on the pill for 10+ years with no issues prior to being diagnosed with that, said she’s gonna go beg soon. she hates condoms like 10x more than i do. until then she needs to not try and stop me because i am a weak man and will be easily stopped lol

 

that's good too. strawberry should be on there somewhere as well.

 

You put the vanilla milkshake in the strawberry milkshake and get a baby

 

Oh that’s how that works thank u

 

What the fucks a black and white milkshake?

 

vanilla ice cream & chocolate syrup

 

"You skipped the best part" - me


"Noooooo I mentioned the pizza" - you

Just felt like saying that idk why

 

There is a 99.4% chance I will have sex tonight

 

There is a 0% chance for me. I'll be out of town

 

Like she can hate condoms all she wants but I’d be in one from the get go, tbh. Kids cost like half a million dollars to raise. $500K!

 

This exact thing is what's been happening to me and it feels so good and terrifying and I shouldn't be doing it but I do anyway but I shouldn't.

 

I don't use a condom with Cait, for several reasons we don't need to get into.

 

Somehow my gf and I have been able to dodge pregnancy scares for over a year now and for that, I'm so grateful. But I know it's only a matter of time at this point haha

 

Because she’s not real?