Movies That Didn’t Actually Happen

For remembering those dime-a-dozen shitty movies (or other parts of culture, why not) that left the public consciousness just as soon as they arrived. The ones that you saw and you know technically exist but feel more like a fever dream that you wouldn’t want to bring up in good company. When a movie is bad and unremarkable but not to a degree that its badness makes it infamous. Scroll through any actor’s filmography and you’re sure to find more than a few of these gems

Remember when they made not one but TWO live-action GI Joe movies? Me neither, yet so many famous, beloved actors were in those, and apparently a lot of people saw them.

 

The only reason I remember Cowboys & Aliens is because I saw it three times in theaters.

 

Adventures of Pluto Nash. No one has seen this movie.

 

Dumb and Dumber To

 

Steve Carell is a king of this genre

 

Saw it!

 

dan in real life

 

My theory is that most of the money grossed from these films is teens in middle/high school who have the choice of either hanging out at some random movie or walking around the mall again

 

Get Smart, Date Night, Burt Wonderstone. Now that he’s a big time drama actor he would have us forget his roots

 

yeah or when you buy a pg13 ticket and sneak into an R

 

I would say most children’s movies are off limits here since kids lack object permanence anyway, but there are exceptions even to that. In the general thread I mentioned the Country Bears movie, but there’s also Cats and Dogs, live action Rocky and Bullwinkle, Son of the Mask

Mac and Me *would* qualify except for Paul Rudd bringing it back from the dead

 

Adam Sandler is interesting because you’d think he would be the reigning champ here, but in reality few of his movies fall into this category. They are either remembered fondly or tip too far into the “infamous” category

 

If anyone reading this ever has a chance to talk to John Mulaney, you should say that the only thing you ever really loved by him was Mulaney

 

Max Keeble's Big Move

 

That cannot be real.

 

the best part is one of his first roles was playing Anthony Bourdain in a Fox tv show

 

Lol never heard of that show