Mental Health Thread • Page 58

*hug

*hug*

 

My grandpa was just telling me how when he was in hs they suspected kids were smoking pot and so they took each kid and looked at their eyes to see if they were dilated and responded fast enough to movement. He was falsely accused and had to spend the weekend in a mental ward and was even put in a straightjacket?? Like omg. It was horrible to hear but it's interesting how knowledge like that can help you piece together someone's personality.

 

My dad and I are processing this whole situation with my sister in different ways and I don't know if I can do what he's asking. He wants me to not make it as obvious or known that I think she should divorce her husband for what he did to her. He wants me to not voice my protectiveness over her and the fact that I don't believe she should go back.

I get that I should let her make her own decision. I want her to be happy. But how the fuck am I supposed to just be silent and hope that the fucker is going to change and become some great, trustworthy guy? I don't want to even risk the potential of something like this happening again.

 

She'll make her own decision regardless of what you or your dad say, but I have no idea why he wouldn't be right there with you telling her to stay away from this dude.

 

Tbh idk what's going on in the situation but as someone who has been in a very toxic relationship before, sometimes saying something only pushes the person away and deepens their resolve and the "us against the world" mentality. Even tho deep down i knew i needed to leave, id get extremely defensive and end up pushing people away who told me to leave, whether by choice or my ex's doing. It's a difficult line to walk. That said, I think there is a way to voice love and support while letting someone know how you really feel, because it's important for them to know that when they're ready to leave, someone will be there for them and it seems like you're that awesome person. I hope it all works out. It's hard watching someone you love go through something so awful and feeling powerless to stop it. I hope your whole family can heal soon.

Sorry for butting in! I know how hard it is. Having been in it and having a friend who is dating someone that raises all sorts of red flags it just sucks.

 

She has moved back home with them for the foreseeable future, but Dad wants her to go through therapy while BIL goes through therapy and then Dad wants them to go to marriage counseling to see if they can reconcile. After he did things that could cause charges to be brought against him.

This is not her first abusive relationship. I'm terrified of her going back and something happening. Whether it's by him or self-inflicted at that point, it doesn't matter. I just can't fathom a situation where going back into that relationship would be safe in any way, even with therapy.

 

I appreciate you sharing your experience. She's done the hard part by leaving, but I guess we'll see how permanent it is. I honestly just can't imagine a world where someone would leave then happily go back when they know they are happier and more themselves outside the toxic environment.

 

It's so easy to go back to someone that is constant and familiar than to have to start over. That's true even for people not in an abusive situation so when you add those layers it's even harder. Your dad's suggestion seems dangerous to me. She def seems like she needs help especially if this isn't her first abusive relationship, cause otherwise even if she does leave the relationship she can easily fall back into the pattern with someone else. I'm really sorry she's going through this. It's amazing she has you to support her though! That support is invaluable and you're an awesome sis.

 

Have any of you ever tried one of suicide hotline online chat things? If so, was it helpful?

 

My rm said the randos will leave when they get back from Nashville. Was still not satisfied cause that's not definite. When after they get back? A few days? A week??? She didn't reply to my texts asking when they'd be back. Well they're back tonight so...................


Apparently my nephew is coming to town and I get to watch him and he'll spend the night on Saturday and I don't want them getting in the way of my time!!!

 

I don't have any motivation and can't get my thoughts straight.

 

My lil sis is such an ass and it sucks being around her sometimes. my older sis is visiting and is on her way. a while ago my lil sis said our older sis snapped her and said she was 1.5 hours away. Time passed and I forgot how long ago my sis sent the snap, so I asked my lil sis how far away she was. I got a yelled out "I DON'T KNOW!! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?!?!" Like freaking out screaming at me to do the math and figure it out myself well duh I was planning on doing the math once you told me when she sent the snap. then she yelled at me asking why I didn't just text our sister myself. well why would I text her if you already knew the answer?? then she freaks out saying she already told me when she got the snap, and like well obviously I forgot or I wouldn't have asked again??


Her answering the question would've taken less time than her screaming at me. it's always like that tho. one simple question sets her off and she acts ridiculous popping off for no reason. it honestly makes me feel awful.

 

Oh man. today was just so bad and seeing my nephew didn't even help. I'm frustrated at myself. I could've and should've done better. Monday will be a new day and if anything I should take the weekend to be less hard on myself to regain positive energy I'll need but I'm beating myself up and nothing is making me feel better. I finally left my nephew cause I felt so depressed and I got home the same time as the randos and just had to go straight to my room to take some breaths. I'm done. I honestly wish I could cry so I could have some form of release. idk why I'm being so hard on myself. it wasn't that bad but I think it's just a culmination of stress. idk.

Woo double post


edit: omg. I went to get ready for bed and saw the rando used half a roll of toilet paper in ONE DAY. of the toilet paper I bought and I'm usually not petty about things like that but that's ridic and I swear I was so cranky I almost freaked out like I almost became a news story about a woman who was pushed to the edge and murdered the household. IS SHE A MUMMY???!!! Literally who uses that much

 

Half of my friends seem to each be having a crisis this week and I just want to help everyone be better but can't even handle my own shit.

 

Got a counselor's appointment set for monday.

Been feeling a lot better about myself of late, but this will be nice.

 

Yay! Happy for you.

 

The therapist I'm seeing now is the best one I've ever had. I actually look forward to going to sessions. I know it's ultimately a business, but this woman really does care about my well-being above pretty much everything else. Having an actual advocate just for myself, particularly during my transition, is a fucking god send.

 

Tonight while hanging with my roommates one of my roomies scrolled by this girl on facebook who used to bully me in jr. high. Then I was telling the other two about said bullying, and roomie #1 was like "yeah but look at how she turned out, she has like no prospects" and I wanted to be like yeah but neither do I so I can't really say I won. Made me feel shitty.

 

I don't wish any ill on people who bullied me, I just want an alternate timeline where that didn't happen but I know that's impossible

or is it?

yeah it is

 

I'm trying real hard. Last week someone quit suddenly with no notice a week after they were hired. Today a new person quit in the middle of the orientation. Nobody was in today so I had to do the work of 4 people. The randos broke my toilet seat and they didn't leave a note or text my rm about it so they better not try to get out of it! It wasn't me!! My nephew was supposed to stay the night at my house tomorrow cause my sister was going out, but her plans got cancelled so now he's not.

Basically, I hate everything and it's like individually these things would be okay but lately my tolerance level is getting worse and worse and worse. There's too many stressful things that are out of my control so I just have to sit by and take it as they come and oh man I'm the worst at that.

 

Last night I was supposed to watch the World Series game with a girl outside Wrigley Field. She said she'd let me know when she could, then never texted me.

Then I got snapchats from the only "friends" I have at college from the party they were at, which marked the second time in just as many nights where they went to a party without even mentioning it to me.

And the Cubs lost and will probably break my heart again by losing the series.Last night just really fucking sucked and I just want life to not be like this anymore.

 

I never really think I'm depressed anymore until I'm in a group of people and I start feeling really down and get the urge to isolate myself and withdraw. idk like it'll be situations where I should feel happy and be involved and I just feel blah. like I should be ecstatic to see my nephew and I am, but the other day they were all hanging out downstairs and I couldn't be bothered to get off the couch. I didn't want to be involved or paricipate even tho I never get to see them and looked forward to them visiting. idk why I'm like that. I think part of it too is that when I hang around the same people a lot I start convincing myself that they find me annoying and don't wanna be around me so I isolate myself cause of that too. mess.

 

The break I took last week definitely helped my mental health. I remember why I work for the company I do, why I want to stay with them, and I was reminded of why I want to work out of the corporate office. I've also realized that, even though my sister is going through some shit and is choosing to stick around said shit instead of cutting and running, I can't put my future plans on hold to take care of her. She is going to have to choose to change things.

 

How can I get the motivation to deal with my responsibilities? My thesis group will be filming this weekend and I have so much to do but I'm just sort of frozen by my anxiety. I just can not physically force myself to do anything, even checking my e-mail right now sends me into a frenzy... Feeling so stuck right now.

 

Adele Opens Up on Her Battle With Postpartum Depression, Says She’s No Longer a ‘Massive Drinker’