Mental Health Thread • Page 482

having a brutal couple of days and i just needed to write this out somewhere

 

I honestly dont know what to do anymore. i'm tired of being alive. tired of putting hours into prepping for interviews and losing out to someone with more experience in some random aspect of the job description. cannot catch a fucking break and haven't for damn near two years. im at my wit's end.

 

I feel like I’ll never be happy
I’ve been in a more depressive state lately and idk how to get out of it.

 

I’m a therapist and I tell my clients that Depression has we who have it believing that life is all about us. So it helps to try and do something that reminds us that our feelings aren’t the only thing that matter. Gratitude lists, volunteering, helping a friend, stuff like that can helpful. Also if it’s super bad, just getting out of bed and doing one productive thing can be super hard, so set the bar low. If you’re allowed to just do the basics of self care (eat, brush teeth, etc) that day, just do that. It’s better than nothing and will help.

 

I am sometimes self-righteous and when I see advice on not always being right and how to handle that or be okay with it, the advice is often geared towards people who care about the other person in the disagreement. Of course I don't want to hurt my partner and if being right is at the expense of hurting them, of course I don't want to

But what about in the situations where I do not care if they are hurt because they are wrong. I want them to know that they are wrong and I want them to feel that and sit in that and understand that there are consequences to those actions. I am burning with the intensity of a thousand suns in my female rage and I want to scorch everyone in my path. What's the advice for that?

 

I would give anything to have an actual support system. I’ve been really really struggling lately so I called my mom last night bc she’s literally the only person I have to talk to. I have told her multiple times hey sometimes I’m struggling and just need to vent and just need to feel like someone is listening and supporting me. Yet every single time she gives me unsolicited “advice” that is not helpful and in fact makes me feel worse. I just wish I had anyone at all. So tired of being completely alone.

 

I’ve been sick 4-5 times the last two months and I’m over it ugh

 

This is an easy trap for well-meaning friends/family to fall into and takes a lot to un-learn. I hope you can get through to her.

 

I relate to the feeling completely alone. I wish I had someone to vent to as well.

 

My family posted pictures online and ugh I hate seeing pictures of myself. I was at my highest weight. Then I gained another 8 pounds. I’ve been trying really hard for months to lose it, eating better, working out 5 days a week consistently. I have lost zero pounds and haven’t noticed a difference at all. I’m so discouraged. And it’s a constant struggle bc I’m trying to do it the healthy way but old habits are hard to break so I’m constantly battling thoughts like “if you skipped meals you’d lose it.” That’s why I can’t do things like calorie counting bc I spiral really bad. It’s just so exhausting. And even when I was at my thinnest and eating barely 1 meal a day I still hated my body so realistically idk if I’ll ever be happy no matter how much weight I lose. I just want to stop thinking about my weight/appearance so much and just be content with how I look.

 

I’ve been having a depressive episode the past few days and I’m one step away from slitting my wrists open. How can I be a father when I feel like this? I don’t want to leave their life and have them grow up without a father like I did. I’m constantly daydreaming of everyone I know living their lives without me and they seem just fine.

 

Hey man, send me a message if you want to talk. I’ll even send my phone number if that’s preferable to you and we can chat on the phone. I appreciate you being a part of this community.

 

I am 100% empathetic and have been there, so I don't mean this insensitively, but can we agree on TWs moving forward when it comes to posting violent or suicidal language/ideation?

 

Feeling a different sort of burn out and exhaustion this morning. We're not even a month into the year and I'm already over it. I have no optimism for anything in my life.

I don't know how to explain it, but it's just a different feeling of exhaustion and being worn out than I normally feel. Don't know if just a side effect of this Abilify I'm on day 4 of that my doctor is having me try alongside my Trintellix and Mirtazapine or what.

TW: ideation

just woke up feeling a strong feeling of ideation and just being done with existing. I'm not about to do anything more than I am any other day. Just been the strongest feeling/emotion in a long time. The other meds had dulled this but not today.

 

I got a promotion at work that has been helpful financially, but extremely stressful, and between that, working on baby stuff at home, my wife not feeling well/being able to do anything, my sister-in-law needing brain surgery and my brother not leaving the house, plus people reaching out all the time, I just feel like I never get a chance to catch up, let alone breathe and take some time for myself. Which is obviously something I need to prepare for w/r/t having a baby, but man...it makes me irritated and a little snappy and probably not fun to be around. I don't know how to recharge myself when there's almost literally no time.

 

@xapplexpiex

hey hope you’re doing ok. You’re a valued poster on this site

 

Thanks a lot for reaching out, to those of you who have been amazing and did. I have a lot I need to sort out and need to increase therapy or my medication dosage. Or make a life change. I need to change regarding my self-esteem and self-worth, but it’s hard when I feel like a piece of shit all the time.

 

Never thought I would be sad about having less work, but I got an email from my awesome supervisors in my old department basically relieving me of my duties in light of my new position and thanking me for my service and man, it's making me sad this morning. Second best job I ever had.

 

The mother of one of my third graders passed away last night unexpectedly. Jesus Christ.

 

aw man, sorry. give them love if you can.

 

not sure why im bothering trying to find the right med combo to make myself mentally better when everything in my life is shit anyways. heading awfully close to two years since i started looking for a new job and im still stuck where i am having made absolutely no progress despite hours and hours and hours put into my resume, interview prep, etc. got close a few times but all of a sudden now its just me getting ghosted over and over again.

 

I can't tell my therapist how I REALLY feel, because that would land me at a psychiatric hospital again. And I don't want that. I have shit to do.

 

Been a crazy few hours. A management position came open at my company a couple weeks ago. I applied and interviewed last week. They sent me an interview feedback on Teams today. Expected to not get it and they gave it to me! Significant pay bump, company vehicle, expense account and I’m now managing five sales reps in a territory instead of just my specific sales route. I knew I was up for it and I had a good shot but still it’s crazy. I feel bad because one of my good coworker buddies was also up for it.

 

Congratulations @Cameron!