I had an old friend of a friend reach out and ask if she could give my number to someone. She said we had a lot in common and thought we'd hit it off. We have a date later this week but I am not really excited. Idk. I'm trying to go in open minded and see if there's more of a connection in person but just from texting and such I'm not really feeling....anything. But this is my first date literally ever so I'm also pretty nervous. Sometimes I feel like something is wrong with me because I just basically never get crushes on anyone (I think I've had maybe 4 crushes in my entire life and 2 were elementary school crushes lol) and always just want to be friends with everybody instead. Then part of me feels like I need to just stop being picky and settle but I don't want to do that either. Then I wonder if I just have a warped perspective of how I'm supposed to feel from like songs and movies and stuff. Idk. I will report back after my date and y'all can either celebrate with me or give me advice on how to tell someone I'm not into them since this is all completely new to me and I have no idea what I'm doing!!!
have you ever considered you might be asexual? I kind of think I might be sometimes but other times I’m definitely not but my hormones are absolutely fucked from years of opiate abuse and medications which obliterates your testosterone so I always wonder how much of it is due to that
I have definitely wondered before if I’m asexual. I always knew I wasn’t straight but I never really knew how to identify. I just called myself bi for a long time bc I didn’t really know what else to call myself. But I tried talking to friends growing up who were bi and they basically shamed me and told me I wasn’t ~really~ bi. Then I heard people referring to themselves as queer and just kinda stuck to that label bc it seemed vague enough for me. I always found women more attractive but am never romantically interested in them but I’ll be romantically interested in a man but not find him attractive. So I really don’t know what to make of it except it pretty much sucks and makes everything very difficult lol But I also grew up in a household where sex was very taboo and shameful so idk if some of it is just from me internalizing all of that. This is where I wish I could try therapy or something but I have horrible insurance so I can’t afford it!
I know I'm not asexual, but I also know that growing up in a Christian household and discovering porn at an early age and years of birth control slowing down my wife's libido, in addition to both of us taking antidepressants, has caused major anxiety and occasional performance issues that leave me often feeling more comfortable with myself than I am with another person, and that feels incredibly sad sometimes. Hard to process and undo all of that while trying to keep a partner happy.
Anxiety has been awful last few days. Not sure if it’s caused by a legit health issue or my worry of the possibility.
I’ve decided that for the first time in my life I need to see a therapist, but I am so overwhelmed. How do I even begin to go about finding one? So far it’s either astronomically expensive or I had something booked and they changed the time of my appointment to during my work day and I had to cancel and now I just feel defeated and have no clue what to do. I need advice
you're probably already aware but Psychology Today's website helped me narrow down options by insurance types/topics/religion or lack thereof
My experience there is the filters keep giving me out of network providers or everyone is just not accepting new clients so I feel like I’m wasting my time filling out applications just to be told it’s gonna be outside my budget
Gotcha, that's frustrating. I had like 3 options when I looked a couple weeks ago and only 1 was accepting new clients.
also man it really is expensive, I'm lucky enough to have a really low copay with my wife's insurance totally unaffordable otherwise
It’s not even that I have bad insurance, it’s just that no one want to take it or just isn’t taking in anyone new. Like I’m trying to take care of myself but now I’m feeling more hopeless and it’s just a cycle and I’m so fucking sick putting in effort to go backwards
it could be worth it to reach out to out of network docs just in case they offer any sort of sliding scale payment plans
I'd try to find a non-profit in your area. They tend to have much lower rates and sliding scale fee plans. That's how my office is.
Pretty awful that you have to rely on the chance of there being a place in your area being nice enough to do sliding scale in order to get the help you need. Broken system
I do appreciate the responses from everyone. I’m waiting to hear back from a few places I reached out to. I’m so exhausted and just wish things could be more transparent in this process
I'm done. Just abso-fucking-lutely done. Been looking for well over a year for a new job and no one -- no one -- will fucking hire me. I'm grateful I have a current job but cannot get another for the life of me. I got so far in the interview process for two and both hit me this week with rejections. Back to square one again. It's beyond mentally exhausting And I keep having little health issues causing me additional stress and anxiety. Had a new one crop up just as I was getting over the previous issue. I just want to fall asleep and not wake up.
Finally talked to my doctor about treating my somewhat general, all the time and travel-induced anxiety and they put me on lexapro. Hope it helps.
We have very similar experiences with our sexual orientation lol I wouldnt say my household was taboo about sex but it def wasn’t addressed all that much. But yeah I’ve bounced between asexual, bi, and queer and the reality is I just don’t know if any word fits how I feel lol. It also largely doesn’t matter because I’ve had the same partner for 8 years and genuinely do not find myself attracted to anybody but her anymore lol
I’ve only been at it for three weeks and I’m exhausted. I’ve sent our 50 applications and heard back from maybe five places. I’ve had three interviews, one of which ghosted me after offering a stage shift to test it out, and one of which I advanced to the second interview but am now anxiously waiting to be invited to the third (I feel like the second went extremely well) and refreshing my email constantly to see if they’ve contacted me yet. It took them a week to interview me the first time and another week to do the second so if it’s another week before this third and another week to start training I’m gonna lose it. Or if I go through all this to ultimately not get the job. I haven’t had a job since February and my parents are taking care of my basic necessities but I need to start making money again for my own sake.