I have to sign a lease for a studio apt today after living with my now ex for 3 years. I feel too many contradicting emotions about this but I also can't stop crying when I think about it for too long. Moving day is gonna be rough.
Another coworker showed up for her 12 o clock shift and will take a ton of the load off of me. I feel a little better lol
It looks like my brother won't be undergoing ECT for the time being as the hospital is putting him on a combination of Prozac and Wellbutrin. Unfortunately, it looks like he's staying there until Monday to see how the combination works before deciding further. We may have to put him on disability because his depression is so severe and the self-loathing is pushing him to near-suicidal feelings.
He's unhappy with staying there longer, but he's much calmer than the first day where he was very upset over the stay. Thank you so much for listening. It's such a comfort here that I can say something and not feel too entirely helpless.
real talk you shouldnt feel this way because most people (see: me) dont do shit their senior year anyway. you aint that far behind. just educate yourself on the topics you're interested in, that's the beautiful thing about the age we live in. you can go learn about whatever you want on your own. maybe one day the education system will be obsolete (fingers crossed)
Isn't it weird how depression can allow you to wake up for about an hour, then go back to sleep for another twelve hours?
Does anyone have parents that have mental health issues? When I was younger and my parents found out the extent of my depression and self harm and stuff my dad opened up that he used to self harm and suffered depression. He is also bipolar. My dad only talked with me about it the one time. I remember in middle school when my parents were divorcing he was hospitalized but my parents never talked about it. I think he had tried to kill himself with a knife, but I've never asked. I just remember going to school and being really distressed about not knowing what was happening and none of my friends talked about their parents going through it so I didn't either. Anyway, it has def made me wanna be more open if I have kids about mental health and stuff. My dad talking about it with me really made me feel less alone and I wish my parents had talked with me more about it when I was younger. My mom never knew how to deal with my depression, partly I think cause she couldn't deal with her own issues either.
YES. About six months ago, I was talking to my dad and found out that he has had depression on and off through adulthood, and that contributed a lot to his alcoholism and anger when I was little. Honestly, I can see it in hindsight, but I never knew it was a problem for him. I think that helps us understand each other a little better and makes our relationship stronger than it was (definitely a daddy's girl either way, so whatever). It also helps with my younger sister, since she's developed anxiety and has been having lots of panic attacks - it makes me feel better to know that I'm not the only one (other than her husband) she can turn to. My mom, though, is entirely uncomfortable with talking about this stuff. Around the same time, I was talking to her about how hard of a time I was having and she straight up changed the topic to some person I've never met having a kid. Definitely hurt, but I guess she just doesn't know how to handle it.
My mom deals with depression but something that I still don't understand is around her period she is basically homicidal. She's good now that they figured everything out but she beat me like everyday. Not spanking like she'd be locked up for child abuse nowadays. My dad mainly worked night shift so he was never here when she went after me. She only took her rage out on me which she still does but not like she used to.
My best friend does that. He's gotten better about it since we had the big fight I mentioned a month or so ago, but he would always just try to make me see the positive side of things and I wanted to stab him.
It's interesting what we notice in hindsight! My dad used to sleep all the time and didn't always go with us to dance competitions or events or anything. It was just normal and he worked graveyards so I didn't question it. Didn't realize until years later that he was depressed. He got a lot better after my parents divorced. It's funny cause I was way closer with my mom pre-divorce, but post-divorce it switched and my mom become an irresponsible abusive mess and my dad stepped it up and took over her role basically. I hope that your dad is doing okay now, and your sister as well! And you! It's kinda comforting that other families have that going on. Like realistically I know they do, but when nobody talks about it it's easy to feel like everyone else is so functional.
my parents both have anxiety too, it's all their fucking fault *slams the door and starts blasting Good Charlotte and My Chemical Romance* it's interesting though because when I'm super anxious/having a panic attack my mom will tell me to "calm down" even though I tell her it's not helpful
My entire family on both sides have mental health issues. I'm not close with my mom's side at all but am very close with my mom. Her side has serious anxiety issues and many people have panic attacks. My mom has anxiety and it is really easy to talk to her about it. It was really cool because she had her first real panic attack recently and she came to me to open up about it because she knows I have them. She even knew it was a panic attack from me describing what mine felt like. Now my dad's side of the family I am very close with but I'm not close with my dad (yay daddy issues lol). But they have anxiety/panic attacks/depression. It can be hard to talk to them though because they downplay my issues ("Oh your brother's anxiety is worse, your dad's panic attacks are worse, your cousin's depression is worse"). I know my dad has serious depression issues and panic attacks but like I said we don't talk much at all (but that's a whole different story lol). I have a hard time talking about my depression with anyone because like I said they downplay my issues or in my mom's case, she doesn't have depression and just flat out doesn't get it. She thinks I can just change it by "thinking positive" which obviously isn't how it works lol