Mental Health Thread • Page 381

Team Zoloft! Aside from the weight gain which is really bothering me it’s been one of the best medications I’ve ever been on, my depression is nearly nonexistent but I do still have to reckon with anxiety quite often as well as the aforementioned regrets of the past but that’s not really depression. Overall it’s been a huge benefit

 

When my Zoloft started working it literally felt like my world was no longer painted in greys but instead actual color that’s the only way I know how to describe it

 

This is my goal honestly. To follow that metaphor, I don't remember the last time I felt like I was seeing actual color. I get crumbs here and there with certain activities... listening to music, seeing live shows, but once that quick serotonin rush wears off I'm back to a constant state of emotional numbness.

 

Sundays are such a bad day for me. Sometimes I feel like those around me don't understand or maybe I'm just not self aware enough. Again today my bf suggested it's my job but I think it's wider than that. I'm stressed about my job specifically, yes, but it's the broader picture I struggle with. Working most of the day every day until I die or retire if I'm extremely lucky, hoping when I get off work I can maybe scrape together a few crumbs of energy/motivation to workout and make dinner and feel like a person. Then it's get ready for bed and do it again for another 40 years. And I work waaaaay less now than i used to. So basically I feel like my problem is capitalism but there's nothing I can do about that. Then the weekend goes by so fast and half of it is to prep for the work week anyway. I just truly don't see the point sometimes. But maybe my bf is right and a less stressful job would help. I am just jaded that it's an easy scapegoat but not the main problem. I feel like I want to do everything and nothing. I want to do stuff but my anxiety and depression crushes any motivation or desire to do something. I just hate it. I hate that as people we theoretically can decide how our society works, and this is what we've chosen.

 

all she really needs is blood work to determine if she's in pre-menopause. Then her doctor can get her on the right meds so she won't lose her fucking mind.

 

Yep. I live in NH and my insurance only suggests people in MA.

 

Today, I honestly am not sure I should have gotten up. I got news that two of my local seats in a predominantly jewish area were lost to republican fascists/nazis because the state dem party decided not to give any candidate or incumbent any funds and showed them the middle finger instead. I already feel close to having a nervous breakdown because that’s scary as fuck. Knowing I have a disability and am of lower middle class, I probably cannot continue to afford to live in this city but I also just can’t go and casually move somewhere I feel safer. It just feels like someone dropped a fucking anchor on my head. I don’t think I have depression but the way life has constantly treated me and knocked me down feels like a version of it. Unless there’s some miraculous funding for people with disabilities, I’ll probably die of mold poisoning in this shithole before I ever am able to get out and live without thinking some toxin will murder me in my own house/apartment.


This morning I also decided to end a friendship. We have a mutual friend who took advantage of and used me and whenever we talked about it they always would downplay my feelings and emotions and make me feel even more like shit for having them. I just don’t want anyone like that in my life anymore.

It’s been a tough day to say the least, just want to cry in my pillow at this point.

 

My mind has been such a mess I forgot to pay a bill. So I was 4 days late with my payment. I’ve never been late paying a bill before!

 

If you asked me 10 years ago where I would be in 10 years, it wouldn’t be this. And not in a good way. I never imagined that I’d STILL struggle with money and to find a decent paying job. And I’m still single and probably end up single forever because my town sucks for the choices in guys.

so my job isn’t going to pay me what I deserve so i need to look for a new one. Good luck to them finding someone to assist our specialist because I’m the only one and know what supplies to order

 

I saw a meme that said dating after 30 is just wondering how someone else is still single and then finding out why. It does feel like that sometimes

 

Damn sorry to see all of this. I hope things turn around for you soon. I’ve gone through having to end a close friendship recently because he did something really gross to someone we both know and was unapologetic. I don’t really have any other close friends around here so it was a big loss but I can’t be close with someone like that.

 

I’m just not doing great. My girlfriend of 3.5 years, who I have a dog with and we just bought a house 6 month ago, said she doesn’t think we should be together anymore. I’ve already been pretty down recently and now I’m down bad.

 

I am so, so sorry. That’s…that’s a lot and I can only imagine how heavy all of that feels right now. You’re a really cool person and while I do hope things turn around for you, I know that doesn’t make it all go away. I hope you have a good support system around you at least because being alone with all of that is rough.

 

Man, you're never gonna believe this but I've actually been there. It's fucking difficult. Be kind to yourself and don't be afraid to put yourself in focus for the foreseeable future. I wish I had more advice, but if you need anything, I'm around. Fwiw, I love interacting with you here and know a ton of others do as well. I hope things improve soon.

 

I will echo what @Nyquist and @Aaron Mook said, I enjoy your presence on the site @imthesheriff. Be kind to yourself and my inbox is open. I don't know how to help as I've not been through that particular situation but I'm a great sounding board.

 

Thank you all. I’m just kinda numb right now. I feel like I’m in a daze or something.

 

I suffer from depression every fall but this time it caused ED. ED is a problem that millions of men experience around the world. The good news is that there are many options available to treat it. Treatments include things like antidepressants, hormone therapy (www.canadadrugsdirect.com/products/viagra), and surgery. While lifestyle changes can also affect the way your body works and make it more likely that you'll have better erections than ever before.

 

@imthesheriff sending you love my friend.

 

I was on the way to thanksgiving at my aunt and uncle’s with my dad and it all kinda hit me and I started to have a panic attack. So now I’m home alone on thanksgiving. But my dog is taking care of me. He can sense I’m down.

 

Dogs are the best. Thinking about you sheriff.

 

Hang in there, man! I’ve been having to do the holidays alone too and it’s rough.

 

thank you, I really do appreciate it. You and everyone else in this thread/on this site are awesome. You hang in there too.

 

Idk where to start but I feel like I failed in life. Spent 6.5 years on a degree that is useless, with very little options for a career. But I did not know the at the time and was made to believe there was many career options. Wrong. If I would have known I would have studied something different.

so now I’m working a job where I’m underpaid (working hard to leave and go somewhere else but there’s things that get in the way). I never imagined I’d be in my 30s and struggle to get by and basically poor. Skipping meals because I don’t have food to eat. Also I’m single af and it sucks to be lonely all the time. It doesn’t help my choices suck where I live and me not being attractive. Idk what I’ll do when I fall ill and no one to take care of me or if I have an emergency and no one to take me to the dr. Guess I’ll have to suffer and die at that point Back to the being poor and single af thing, I’ll likely never be able to own a house and will be stuck in a small shitty apt for the rest of my life. Idk what I did in a past life to deserve this awful shitty life I have now

 

I totally understand where you’re coming from regarding a useless degree. It took me 6 years to finish college too and I’m not working anywhere near my area of study. I struggled with similar feelings for years and still do from time to time. And if it helps, there’s entire generations of people dealing with the same disappointments. We were told college was the exact way to avoid such problems.
You aren’t a failure and you haven’t done anything in this life or another to deserve hardship. Taking steps to change your situation for the better is the best thing you can do and I hope it goes well for you.