Mental Health Thread • Page 268

My dad definitely saw a tweet I made recently about student loan debt, how I didn't want to go to college and am happier making min wage at Sprouts than working in marketing...and replied telling me my math was off and I only owe 6k on the student loan in his name lol

Honestly I have no idea what I'm gonna do with myself after I'm healed up from surgery. Probably keep working at Sprouts. Too bad UBI isn't a thing here yet.

 

I feel really aimless in my career and in my life and I have no talents or passions, can't see myself staying in this job for long, can't see any other job coming along, can't see any future

 

My therapist made a point about sobriety I didn’t really think about: Am I doing this for myself or am I doing this because it’s expected of me?

 

What do you think?

 

A little from both sides to be honest

 

I’m starting to feel really isolated

 

I almost had a panic attack at work, thankfully I was able to go the bathroom and just chill for a moment.

 

I feel ya. Sometimes I sit in this staffroom and I want to cry. It takes a lot not to.

I don’t speak Japanese and I’m the only British guy in the room just alone and freaking out. It can be really bloody scary.

Glad you found a place to calm yourself down though.

 

Back to uni tomorrow and I am nervous! Worried about the workload, especially knowing that we'll be working on more video packages and also podcasting! Not looking forward to the media law & ethics unit either. I'm also scared of facing two of my friends and one of my lecturers, the only people besides my boyfriend and this thread to know that I had an abortion. I had to tell them - after the procedure, I was an emotional wreck and couldn't leave my bed, I ended up submitting an assignment late and didn't want to fail the unit so I applied for special consideration and told my teacher what was happening. I was working on a group assessment with my two friends and I badly let them down and haven't seen them since. Luckily, we were graded individually so they'll be okay. I hate this feeling, things were going so well up until the last two weeks of the trimester. In fact, it was the happiest and most motivated I've ever been. I'm afraid that I might've lost that.

 

All I do is fuck up. Goddammit.

 

All you can do is try, man. Nothing always turns out right but as long as you keeping trying and pushing, then that’s what counts.

 

I needed this pick me up and figured maybe someone else did too

 

I am damaged beyond repair.
The smallest things can make me really upset and I can’t control it. It’s embarassing.

 

Maybe one day I'll stop whining about being unhappy and actually do something about it (that day is not today)

Edit: this is also the name of my the 1975 cover album

 

As of this morning my credit card balance is the lowest it’s been since July 2014 and by the end of June, if all goes well, I won’t be carrying any balance at all.

I paid off a much much smaller card a few months ago and it didn’t seem that special and even seeing the balance so low on my main card doesn’t really make me feel anything. Maybe it just hasn’t sunk in yet but I guess I expected to feel a weight off my shoulders and I guess I never really felt any weight or pressure? I’ve been very lucky to never miss a payment or have any fees attached so I have no horror stories thank god, but I guess I’d just feel a sense of accomplishment for bringing this bastard of a balance down from such a high amount (8K) and I haven’t really had that.

Still happy it’s almost all gone though, that’s for sure!

 

I level with this. It really doesn’t take much to set me off. At the moment I’m in a good place but it is unnerving knowing that I can wake up one day and it won’t take much to ruin my day. Keep strong!

 

Well done!! That’s a hell of a figure to whittle it down from, I’m impressed!

I’m pretty naff with my finances so I purposely don’t own a credit card at the moment, but at some point I’ll need one for the credit scores. Learning a lot about myself here and think I’m slowly becoming more adult...

 

I have just been feeling like complete shit lately and getting invited to my 10-year high school graduation party thing is making me feel even worse tbh. Like oh boy, 10 years later and I'm still in the exact same spot as before. Still single. Still friendless. Still working the same dead-end job. Still living at home. Still can't drive. Still a giant fucking failure. And then I see everyone else catching up and how accomplished they are with their lives..... And I know everyone makes their lives look better blah blah but still makes me feel absolutely awful. I don't even know why it bothers me so much when I hate about 99% of those people anyway but here I am.

 

I know the feels! I have no plans to go to my 10 year. I have no friends, low playing job (like near min wage), live at home (no way can I afford a 1bed with what I get paid). People be owning houses, becoming doctors, etc. Plus people were mean to me and idc to see them. Liked they probably wouldn’t even notice I wasn’t there.

 

I am at a job fair right now and uh yeah I’m pretty sure this is my nightmare. There are so many people here. So I guess this is also an American nightmare. Be right back, gonna go head to my car and sweat out an anxiety attack while people stare at my resume like “nope not this guy.”

 

Also Taco Bell has a table here and they’ve been put in the corner and everyone keeps walking right by them like “What do we have here oh it’s Taco Bell keep walking then and avoid eye contact” and it’s the saddest.

 

I know it's easier said than done but nobody in this thread should feel behind or ashamed for not having a career or not being far enough on a life path. I have never met a single person who feels content or satisfied with where they are in life and I'll be honest I have a professional career job and it's overrated. It is stress and responsibility and trying not to have a mental breakdown everyday so... I guess the Grass is always Greener and you shouldn't compare yourself to others because we are all miserable!!

 

I attended a few job fairs and mass hiring events for companies after I graduated from college. They were always overwhelming and I never got much interest from companies. I really hope to never go through either ever again.

 

Sort of a crosspost from Vent Your Frustrations but:

I'm still mad about this. I feel like I should be over it by now, but this on top of a really shitty day at work the other day made me feel so fucking unbelievably low. I basically felt useless at my job because I kept fucking up. It probably shouldn't bother me as much as it does, but it's to the point where the stress is making me feel physically sick.