Mental Health Thread • Page 253

Discussion in 'General Forum' started by AelNire, Mar 9, 2016.

  1. Kiana

    God-uncle Charlie! Prestigious

    today was actually a pretty good day. I got a lot of little work things done and everyone I talked to was really polite which is not common for my job all the time. I also have gotten my appetite back so I went shopping yesterday and made dinner today and I packed my lunch for tomorrow which is probably the most productive I've been in a long time. I also found out that the Sephora gift card I got for Christmas that didn't have an amount on it was for twice as much as I thought it was. I also get to have my nephew spend the night with me tomorrow night which is exciting. Hopefully I can find the motivation to clean my house because it's a hot mess and my nephew's coming over but today generally went okay. I have also made a list for my new counselor to talk about what I want out of therapy which I think is the first time in therapy I've ever kind of even had an idea of what I want from it in a way that I can write down tangibly which is encouraging
     
  2. JulieLynn

    I am Switzerland Supporter

    This is really great news buddy! I'm here for ya if you ever need to talk! Going off meds is a process so take it day by day!
     
  3. xapplexpiex

    I am nobody Supporter

    My new job is giving me a sense of purpose and I’m feeling confident in myself.
     
  4. supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    Another rough day spent asking the universe if this will ever end
     
  5. Kiana

    God-uncle Charlie! Prestigious

    I told my new counselor in a sort of vague way about my issues with my parents divorce and how that basically destroyed my mental health forever lol and the way I think and view things as a person and she wants to focus on that for a while and I'm a little nervous. I've talked to people about it rarely and in sort of a vague way but haven't delved specifically into some of the trauma and immense guilt I feel and I hope I can be honest. I think it needs to be done cause it's like the epicenter of all my issues but that also makes it the most like devestating can of worms to open and I'm anxious.


    I will say that I already like this counselor more than my previous. She's not expressive which I appreciate because I'm a weirdo. She seems to get where I'm coming from even tho she wants me to try yoga instead of my normal gym routine which I'm not totally sold on. Nothing against yoga, I just am set in my ways sometimes lol
     
  6. PeacefulOrca

    Prestigious Prestigious

    So, this is gonna be tough

    I found out the girl I have been dating for several years had another life I didn't know about, was dating and married another guy. I had absolutely no idea until yesterday morning. The worst part was she made it out to be nbd. I realized I even slept with her two weeks after the wedding. I just feel so disgusting and disgusted. I don't think there's anything worse than when someone claims they care about you, feels bad, are sorry etc. while they clearly did not and were actively hurting you behind your back for at least a year or more. You don't get to say you feel remorse because if you did you wouldn't have done this to someone you supposedly do care about. You don't want until after the friggin wedding to tell someone you cheated on them and whoops, we were together for so long that we got married. Awh, shucks. She didn't even tell me, I found out by seeing a picture on her moms social media of her in a wedding dress blushing for the other guy while walking down the aisle. It also made me kind of realize that this guy wasn't the secret, I was. She never introduced me to her friends or her family and clearly this guy was the opposite. I was the dirty little secret for her. It's just devastating. How could I be so stupid? I cried myself to sleep.
     
    LWS and supernovagirl like this.
  7. @PeacefulOrca i know it’s easier said than done but try not to beat yourself up about this. this is all due to a choice she made, not from something you did or didn’t do. I’m really sorry this happened to you :heart:
     
  8. PeacefulOrca

    Prestigious Prestigious

    Thanks Maddie, It's really tough. The worst part is really that she confirmed it was for the exact reasons I suspected. We're from opposite classes and I just wasn't good enough. To her, I was just kind of a nice fling until she found a stable dude and once she did she just didn't care at all to let me know or stop seeing me. The ironic thing is her ex before me actually left her at the alter to marry another girl..... just fuckin ugh. The support from everyone has been so great though, that has to be the one positive.
     
    Borat likes this.
  9. rebecca

    Regular

    I love Portland Maine so much. I went into town twice this week and walked around and it's so nice. Then today I went through all the art events I wanna go to on Facebook and there is so much happening. There are way more opportunities for just about anything than in my hometown.

    I am still struggling with like...executive function and loneliness. As for executive function, I need to clean but I'm always either exhausted or dying to get out of my room. I'm going to clean today though. And loneliness is a hard one, I don't know many people here and my friends can't visit me and there actually aren't many students here right now. These things should improve with time I hope.
     
  10. supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    Ugh @PeacefulOrca im so sorry. That’s so shitty and like Mad said it says everything about her and nothing about you. I can’t imagine how you’re feeling but you know you have us to vent to and lean on
     
    dadbolt and PeacefulOrca like this.
  11. PeacefulOrca

    Prestigious Prestigious

    Thank you so much to you both. I've had such great support today, I'm extremely grateful.
     
    theagentcoma, mad and supernovagirl like this.
  12. BirdPerson

    fuck tammy! Prestigious

    @PeacefulOrca if her husband doesn't know, you should tell him
     
  13. I’m so sorry, @PeacefulOrca. Her actions do not reflect on you at all - please remember that. Reach out to me any time
     
    BirdPerson and PeacefulOrca like this.
  14. PeacefulOrca

    Prestigious Prestigious

    I don't want to give out every single detail but I don't know if he knows and they have an open marriage so I'm not sure if he would care but there isn't any way for me to find out who he actually is. She wouldn't answer when I asked if he knows, she refuses to ever mention him other than indirectly when she talks about how miserable she is. I've only seen one picture of him solo at a holiday thing sitting on a couch, but I at least know forsure he's way uglier than me.
     
    BirdPerson likes this.
  15. BirdPerson

    fuck tammy! Prestigious

    I bet a million trillion dollars that they don't actually have an open marriage. Just sayin. But like other people have said, none of this is a reflection on you. It's all her, and it ain't a good look. Hang in there, friend.
     
    PeacefulOrca likes this.
  16. totally fell off on my whole "set and achieve small goals to build self esteem/motivation" thing, but then I spent almost all of today cleaning and re-organizing my bedroom, and I've started using my agenda again so I think I'm officially back on track
     
    GrantCloud, Joe4th, LWS and 3 others like this.
  17. supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    It’s been a month and sleeping alone still means waking up every other hour and tossing and turning through the night.
    It sucks to try so hard to get your mind under control and then your body’s just like lol I had other ideas anyway~

    I just feel so defeated like how long until this gets better
     
  18. Kiana

    God-uncle Charlie! Prestigious

    Every day when I wake up it's like ... this is it? This is life? Just this every day until I die? It's disappointing. I need to get it together and make some changes but I miss being younger when yeah it was super scary and overwhelming and filled with pressure to think about the future but it felt vast and open. It feels so determined now, or at least narrowed down. Every year I get older it feels like another year wasted or another year towards a life I'm not content with and I feel more aware than ever how every year I continue I feel more trapped or locked down.
     
    LWS, SlappinCups, Shakriel and 3 others like this.
  19. awwgereee

    I want to wake up and maybe be better

    I had an appointment today with my therapist for the first time in six months. I always get really anxious the day of my appointments and try to persuade myself that I'm fine and can figure things out without help, but then I always feel better afterwards and I need to remember this feeling.
     
    LWS, SlappinCups, jorbjorb and 7 others like this.
  20. Vase Full Of Rocks

    Trusted Supporter

    Feeling like an absolute and useless fool. I've just wanted to cry for most of the day. Directionless, feel like a burden to my friends and especially my parents. I hate my job and who I am and I'm going broke and can't afford to live in my apartment. I've always told myself I'll get better and figure things out, but I never do. I never work for anything and I never have and now I feel as though I'm completely incapable of doing so.

    I want to be someone else.
     
  21. BirdPerson

    fuck tammy! Prestigious

    Old unhealthy actions from old unhealthy me are resurfacing now and fucking things up for newer, much healthier me and I'm not quite sure what to do about it.

    I used to lie a lot about my alcohol and weed consumption. I don't anymore, but that doesn't undo the previous lies.
     
  22. Carmen SD

    Regular

    3 months at my job and I've been asked to become a lead staff. I think I might do it. More pay. Basically the same thing I do, but I make sure people are also doing their job (and I know some people already don't because I have to pick up their slack), and document (which some people don't and I kinda what to tell them to just do it)

    One hard part is a friend I made at work has been really lazy for the past month or so and it's getting irritating. I'm constantly picking up her slack, she complains how she doesn't want to help a certain person because "they don't like her", or "they yell at her", and I've been yelled at too by the same persons and so has others and it just comes off as she rather have me get yelled at than her. Especially if that person is not on my assignment and she avoids going to them. She will also literally avoid going to someone saying "they can wait" because she thinks they're impatient which isn't really true for most people, so I end up helping them. I can go on other ways she avoids doing her job and how I have to pick up her slack.
     
  23. personalmaps

    guppy Supporter

    I woke up way too early and checked Instagram to see that my abusive ex who I haven’t spoken to in 6 years liked my latest picture on Instagram. I was Not prepared for how much that would instantly scare the shit out of me and send me into a total panic. Luckily my best friend happened to be awake and talked me down a bit but Jesus fucking Christ. Why now? I feel so violated and unsafe and gross knowing he was going through my feed and looking at my life.