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Louis C.K Responds to Accusations: “These Stories are True”

Discussion in 'Article Discussion' started by Melody Bot, Nov 10, 2017.

  1. Melody Bot

    Your friendly little forum bot. Staff Member

    This article has been imported from chorus.fm for discussion. All of the forum rules still apply.

    Louis C.K. has responded to accusations of sexual misconduct. The full statement can be found below.


    I want to address the stories told to The New York Times by five women named Abby, Rebecca, Dana, Julia who felt able to name themselves and one who did not.

    These stories are true. At the time, I said to myself that what I did was O.K. because I never showed a woman my dick without asking first, which is also true. But what I learned later in life, too late, is that when you have power over another person, asking them to look at your dick isn’t a question. It’s a predicament for them. The power I had over these women is that they admired me. And I wielded that power irresponsibly. I have been remorseful of my actions. And I’ve tried to learn from them. And run from them. Now I’m aware of the extent of the impact of my actions. I learned yesterday the extent to which I left these women who admired me feeling badly about themselves and cautious around other men who would never have put them in that position. I also took advantage of the fact that I was widely admired in my and their community, which disabled them from sharing their story and brought hardship to them when they tried because people who look up to me didn’t want to hear it. I didn’t think that I was doing any of that because my position allowed me not to think about it. There is nothing about this that I forgive myself for. And I have to reconcile it with who I am. Which is nothing compared to the task I left them with. I wish I had reacted to their admiration of me by being a good example to them as a man and given them some guidance as a comedian, including because I admired their work.

    The hardest regret to live with is what you’ve done to hurt someone else. And I can hardly wrap my head around the scope of hurt I brought on them. I’d be remiss to exclude the hurt that I’ve brought on people who I work with and have worked with who’s professional and personal lives have been impacted by all of this, including projects currently in production: the cast and crew of Better Things, Baskets, The Cops, One Mississippi, and I Love You, Daddy. I deeply regret that this has brought negative attention to my manager Dave Becky who only tried to mediate a situation that I caused. I’ve brought anguish and hardship to the people at FX who have given me so much The Orchard who took a chance on my movie. and every other entity that has bet on me through the years. I’ve brought pain to my family, my friends, my children and their mother.

    I have spent my long and lucky career talking and saying anything I want. I will now step back and take a long time to listen. Thank you for reading.

     
  2. Zip It Chris

    That berg attacked us, war on the arctic! Supporter

    With so many victims out there, this wave of claims and ruined careers is overwhelming to say the least. Many people I admired, some of my favorite movies, songs, and tv shows are items I will make a conscious effort not to enjoy ever again. I appreciate the fact that C.K. has owned this, and I hope he learns for it. He has daughters that he talks about all the time, who know now, that their dad has been a pervert for decades. Just disgusting, disappointing, and shameful...hard to find words.
     
  3. Saephon

    Regular

    I hope he really means every word of that. With everything going on right now, I think we're going through a long overdue "what's under the carpet" process. I have a feeling there will be many more people and works of art tainted as we proceed. But we need to do it. And this isn't about punishment, or ending careers, or purging Hollywood and finding out everything we loved is ruined and you're never able to enjoy it ever again. This is about truth, and healing.

    The hurt any of us feel when we think about our favorite comedian or actor or role models being outed like this is nothing compared to any of the abuse victims. So I'd really like people to mention that sort of thing less. Besides, you might find you're unable to enjoy anything ever again if that's matters most to you. This shit runs deep.
     
    lish likes this.
  4. Nathan

    Always do the right thing. Supporter

    I hope the best for the women and Louis’ daughters. I hope the women speaking out can have careers and lives viewed as separately from these allegations as possible. They deserve autonomy, and I feel like in media circuses like this survivors and victims are often unfairly branded for the rest of their lives with the association.
     
  5. Nathan

    Always do the right thing. Supporter

    And to be clear, this statement is rendered meaningless by his refusal to engage or accept accountability and reflect and take a step back and try to change for the last 15 years. He was asked about these accusations multiple times, and each and every time either refused to engage or dismissed them, creating the image that the women, with smaller platforms than his, were lying. His movie was pulled. His work was pulled from HBO. His FX deal is in danger. That’s why he’s saying all this. That’s his primary motivation and it’s transparent.
     
  6. Bayside 182

    Wolverine Supporter

    obviously the story is terrible and I'm jut commenting on this statement and not the story itself, but it is refreshing to hear someone reply with something that seems genuine
     
    Colby Searcy and jorbjorb like this.
  7. crunchprank

    crunchprank.net Prestigious

    Jesus Christ. He doesn't regret anything he did, only that he got caught. He put it in a movie so recently that it hasn't even been officially released yet. Would someone who is truly regretful of their actions turn it into a joke as recent as this year? That right there tells you how little he cared about any of his actions. Dude should go away forever.
     
  8. So. Hmmm...

    Can we talk about consent for a moment?

    Excuse me if this is the wrong venue for the incoming rant, but I think this situation with C.K. is the perfect place to point out some overarching problems I've seen concerning the rise of the "consent culture." (Note: All I'm trying to do here is spark thoughtful conversation about the morality and legality of sexual behaviors within our democratic republic. If anyone is upset or triggered by this post, please let me know and I'll delete it.)

    For the past few years, I tried to talk less and less, and listen more and more, as people have been discussing these issues of abuse, rape, and sexual rights and wrongs. What I have seen, largely, is a movement of people who believe that "consent" is the answer to everything. If two adults say "yes" to each other, than all agreed-upon sexual behavior is okay.

    That might be an oversimplification, but the red flag screaming out at me in these C.K. accusations is that this is where the "consent" model breaks down. Wasn't he doing exactly what he was supposed to be doing, according (at least) to the rules of consent? Asking people for their permission, and moving forward with a "yes" or turning away with a "no"?

    Yet even then, C.K. acknowledges that what he was doing was wrong, even when the girls said yes. Let's look at the complications here. Obviously, there's the abuse of power and influence. But is there any situation where someone in power can seek sexual consent from someone beneath them without that consent being -- in some way, shape, or form -- compromised? C.K. seems to be saying, as well, that the entire idea of masturbating in front of someone is an act of perversion. If so, then is there any circumstance outside of an established romantic relationship where this type of behavior would be permissible? If not, then by what standards? Who gets to decide that this is always a wrong action?

    Generally speaking, I think most of the consent culture agrees that consent doesn't count if someone isn't in the right mind to make decisions (i.e., drunk, drugged). Yet it doesn't take a substance for people to be able to make decisions that they will later regret. Whether it's because of power or influence or infatuation or fear, it seems that adults make consensual sexual decisions on a regular basis that they later realize, all too late, were mistakes. Time and space gives them clarity to see, such as with the awful story breaking today about Jesse Lacey, that the victim was being manipulated and pressured all along. What can be done to help people in these situations who might be offering consent in the middle of being abused?

    Obviously, I'm not presenting any answers. Nor do I mean to distract from the victims, whose bravery should be honored and whose healing should be prioritized. But I also think that we, as a culture, need to figure out -- and fast! -- how we can benefit the people all around us who are in danger of becoming future victims, as well as how we can bring sound judgment and sexual respectfulness to those people all around us who could become future abusers by the allowance, acceptance, and gradual degradation of selfish and predatory habits.

    I think consent is an important and good thing -- but it's not the answer. It's one piece of the puzzle.
     
  9. Malatesta

    i may get better but we won't ever get well Prestigious

    truly, this was what Louie meant every time he dismissed these accusations as "rumors" for years
     
    jawstheme and skogsraet like this.
  10. skogsraet

    Trusted Supporter

    Yeah this sums up why his statement fell real flat to me

     
    Kingjohn_654 and jawstheme like this.
  11. Chinesefood

    Regular

    Glad he finally made a statement, and not a bad one at that. Hopefully the world can forgive him and move on, as I have and will.
     
  12. joey-wan kenobi

    Happiness is a warm gun mama

    Peoples various reactions confuse me, Here’s a few reasons why:

    -CK admitted he did wrong.
    -He admitted he abused his so-called power.
    -People are pissed he’s not saying sorry.

    The admit your wrongdoing is very powerful. Also, Most the time nobody believes “I’m sorry” anyway.

    What do we expect from people short of going back in time and making the right decision?

    I’m also on team: “let’s converse.”
     
    Chase Tremaine likes this.
  13. Nathan

    Always do the right thing. Supporter

    Anything he said is nullified by dismissing these as rumors multiple times over the last few years, including very recently. How about an apology for that?
     
  14. Nathan

    Always do the right thing. Supporter

     
  15. personalmaps

    citrus & cinnamon Supporter

    @Chase Tremaine

    You bring up a valid point. A lot of feminist discourse over the last few years has sought to replace the idea of a simple “yes means yes” which the better concept of ENTHUSASTIC consent. Because you’re right, power imbalance and easily cause a coerced “yes” to sexual activity. The concept doesn’t do much to stop violent assault, but it is something that can help dismantle a toxic culture that seeks to blur consent.

    There are a lot of people (especially men) who seem confused as to what is or isn’t harassment. It isn’t forgoveable, necessarily, but there is a societal sickness that strives to keep women in the dark about their options. I’ve seen a lot of men trying to reconcile past behavior after realizing it was shitty, or even just wondering if they’ve done something that felt normal to them that made someone uncomfortable. The best anyone can do is look for that enthusiastic consent. Is the person you’re with sober and of sound mind? Have they given you a happy, verbal yes without any pressure or dialogue from you? (You in the general sense, of course.)

    As far as victims go, it’s the same situation. It takes a lot of strength to step back and look at your life and see if you are really in control of it, especially when power imbalance is so rampant. I think the best thing we as a whole can do is to keep spreading resources. Whether it be feminism 101, simple awareness about abuse, stadticis, anything. If we try to replace the toxicity with information and recourse, it can help. Just in the past 5 years, I have seen many victims learn and be able to heal because of such resources. And I’ve seen many people be able to identify abuse and manipulation because they has learned to spot it in the first place. It’s a slow start, but it IS happening. We just have to stoke the fire.