LGBTQIA+ Thread • Page 4

oh word!! didn't see you in here.

 

sooo I think I might try out male pronouns on here.

story: yesterday was my birthday and Gina and I went out and the waiter said "ladies," etc and once directly referred to me as lady (like birthday lady or something) and i cringed internally, and afterward Gina asked if that had bothered me and...yeah. i know i don't pass or anything, but i was secretly hoping or at least not wanting to hear that, and also i'm pretty sure cis people don't question or care about this stuff. so yeah. welcome to my mid 30s crisis, general forum thread, which i wish was still in PL where not as many people would see it because no one cared about moonpies' uncle

 

He is coming for the summer but because of money will have to stay for a while until he can afford to go back, he isn't coming just for me though his dad lives here you see. I would say how I truly feel about him but he wants to hear it in person and I kind of feel that would be the right thing to do as well. He even has said he has something he can only say in person to me as well. I just don't know if I could deal with the distance once we have met and then he goes back. Thanks for helping me talk through this by the way, don't have many people to do so.

 

Happy late birthday! Yeah, most cis people I know don't care about pronouns or bother asking people about them. I've gotten in the habit of when I meet people (outside of work) I ask them what their pronouns are. At work I usually don't do that because I could *theoretically* get fired for being trans. Anyway, you should definitely go with whatever pronouns you're most comfortable with. Just let us know so we can use the correct ones for you!

Also, I also wish that this was in PL or something, but on the other hand this might make it easier for people to find the SUPER QUEER THREAD.

 

I think it's good PL was done away with. Despite spending a majority of my early time on ap in PL. I feel General will have a lot more traffic so the thread might not die and I feel General had gotten a good bit better on AP in the past while, there was less antagonistic posts. In addition we're trying to foster a more inclusive and better forum here where judgement and discrimination aren't tolerated.

 

I can understand that perspective. I guess the main reason why I think PL was useful is because it can be used as a tool to connect with other LGBTQIA people without outing yourself in the more *general* community. Like, when I first came out as trans I didn't share that with most people I was friends with on AP. Most of them didn't post in PL and if they lurked they at least understood that what happens in PL should stay in PL. With how internet communities can be so tied to IRL communities, it can be nice to have a place that one is comfortable in that's also a bit separate from the people that one regularly interacts with.

That being said, I'm all for being inclusive and not separating forums/people as much. I think that PL served its purpose, so it's not really necessary. My argument for having PL is most likely based in a "this is how it used to be and I'm used to that" mindset. Which we all have, one way or the other.

 

Yeah, I definitely get that and I can see how that would be daunting in such a public forum like General. However, PL was weird in a way that when I posted there it was completely devoid of mods and it became a bit of a free for all which encouraged a lot of, let's say, less welcome interaction for General and PL posters. Avoiding such a situation is key here.

I'm not 100% sure, personally how to replicate that feeling of PL in the new sites but as Jason has said throughout the forum they're still evolving as they grow so input like that is good. So maybe bring it up with Jason, or a mod by tagging them?

A workaround, if you will, could be the group conversations implementation where you can create a group chat with a number of other users, but I'm not sure if that will replace your thoughts about PL?

 

Yeah, I have no idea what would be the best way to kind of implement my ideas. I honestly think that Jason and the mods will figure out what works best for them and we'll adapt to that. I'm not too worried about it. If the community continues to be as welcoming as it has been, then I don't think there will be any need to change from what's currently working.

 

I think the intention was to have the thread in Politics for things of a more serious nature and this thread as more of a chat thread/hangout/general safe zone.

 

Also, just because new people are starting to pop up, I just want to generally say that no one in this thread should feel pressured to make some sort of announcement or whatever as to how you identify or labels or anything. If you're not out or questioning, please don't feel that you can't post here. This is very much a safe space for anyone in any part of the community and any step of their journey. I think I can speak for everyone when I say any identities, pronouns, names, etc will be honored and respected here.

 

I'm late to the party but real life trans person here too :)

 

Cats > guys. I've realised that I'll be happier if I just accept this fact :)

 

Based on my recent dating history, really starting to think you might be right about that Jake.

PS. Hi everyone!

 

I haven't dated anyone this year yet. I'm cool with that. I think I'm emigrating soon so I don't really want to get with someone while that's coming up.

 

Cats are better. Embrace it instead of being ashamed.

 

Lately I've been indulging my queer side a lot more, but it's confusing. I don't really know how to accurately represent the ball of confusion that is how I identify and associate with genders. I like all of the aspects (and acknowledge all the benefits) I get as a male, and I like my body, but I also feel like if I had a soul it wouldn't be a male, as cheesy as that is. I painted my nails yesterday and wore my hair up in a way that I usually don't. Pretty happy nobody really said anything to me and just accepted it, but then again people have always known I wasn't straight up hetero so they probably just assume I'm gay and finally coming out haha

I wish I had more of a place to talk about this IRL. Everybody around where I live is so black and white, it's hard to really discuss such a nuanced thing

 

:hug emoji:

 

My boyfriend has been the same way recently. He got to wear a wig recently and a skirt and said it felt right for him. Id be happy to hear you out in PMs.

 

Thank you, I will remember this offer! I'm glad it made him feel good and I hope he continues to find what he wants.

I feel very comfortable talking about this stuff on here, it's just a shame I can't express my opinions to the people who it directly involves. It's like it shocks my close friends but I've been thinking it since I was like 15, I just haven't ever had the proper avenue to express it haha. Although lately I suppose I've met a few more open-minded people compared to the ilk around my town

 

@Doomsday None of that is cheesy at all. Thanks for opening up to us.

 

Waddap.

I'm bisexual myself and whenever I try to think about the intricacies of my gender I get a headache so all I can say is that I sure as hell ain't cis. Genderfluid is as close as I can get to a description that seems most accurate.

 

I feel that I listed my gender here as IDK so

 

Gender is a confusing thing. I don't think that you necessarily have to find a label that perfectly matches or describes you. A lot of the terms used like genderqueer or non-binary are "umbrella terms" that simply denote the idea that you don't subscribe to the traditional distinction between male or female. I hope you understand that your idea of gender is allowed to be weird and nuanced; your gender can be as unique and hard to define as what makes you, you. You don't have to be able to place yourself neatly into any categories and your gender is still valid even if you can't find a way to accurately describe the feelings.

 

guys Cameron Esposito is my favorite

 

her lil smirk makes my heart jump