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Jesse Lacey Releases a Statement • Page 13

Discussion in 'Article Discussion' started by Melody Bot, Nov 11, 2017.

  1. aoftbsten

    Trusted Supporter

    I only read about all this yesterday, so I haven't had much time to process all of this. Like pretty much everyone here, Brand New has been a pretty big part of my life, so this one hurts pretty bad. Of course, I'm also well aware that my feelings as a fan are largely irrelevant. It's the victims that matter here. I don't want to lose sight of that.

    In the debate of whether or not I can continue listening to the band. Probably not. I thought I could, but I've been thinking back on all these songs now and it's just impossible to separate the two now. Basically Lostprophets all over again for me. That band meant a lot to me when I was, but I haven't listened to them since everything with Watkins was revealed. It sucks to give up something important to you, but given time it's not as hard as it sounds.

    I always thought "Me vs Maradonna vs Elvis" was supposed to be chastising of men who behave this way. And sure, maybe Jesse was lashing out at himself in that song. But the stories of the victims put the timeline of all this way past the release of Deja, so it's pretty clear he never changed. What was once a powerful song to me is just a flat out lie now. Imagine being one of the victims and hearing that song. It's like he's openly bragging about it to them.

    And his "apology" is pathetic. He says that was the old him and he's been better for a while now. Well, then why the hell does "In The Water" have a callback to "Maradonna" ("hide your daughters, the old men say, we were young once before, we know how we get our way") in it? Again, imagine being a victim and hearing that lyric today. And then he's acting like he's the victim in all this?

    I think most men would be lying if they said they haven't contributed to this toxic environment in someway, myself included. But in order to build a better, safer world we have to own up to our behaviors. If you've done something wrong, turned a blind eye to this type of behavior, turned stuff like this into a joke, realize you've hurt or made a woman (or really just any fellow person) uncomfortable in anyway then admit your guilt, apologize to those you've wronged and do better going forward. Don't expect forgiveness either. Not everyone should be forgiven. Chances are you don't deserve it. But you better be sorry. Sincerely sorry. Don't try to brand yourself as the one who is hurting.
     
  2. TheDarksighed

    OG Veronica Sawyer

    On a tangential note, if you're interested in returning/cancelling/refunding your Science Fiction LP order from PMT!, can you call/email Second City Prints (the company handling the Science Fiction LP distribution).
    Even if your LP is in transit like mine, they'll provide instructions on how to send your orders back for a full refund.

    Second City Prints
    Email:
    procrastinate@secondcityprints.com
    Phone: (630) 504-2423
     
  3. Terry

    Newbie

    Classy
     
  4. youwontknow

    If I smile with my teeth, bet you'd believe me

    We could relate - but we couldn't WRITE them.
     
  5. tyramail

    Trusted Supporter

    I’m sorry you had to go through that. That is one thing I think his defenders need to put into perspective - think about it from the survivor’s position.
     
    _unproductive likes this.
  6. Maybe, I don't know. If I can find the right guest and think I have something worth saying, I might.

    My current thoughts are here: Yesterday at 12:20 PM
     
  7. Adrian Villagomez

    aav.works Supporter

    Your last paragraph is spot on.
     
  8. JLBagnall

    Newbie

    I agree with all of that. I probably just didn’t make my point very well.

    17 isn’t a minor here in the UK (although that situation would be considered pretty weird). Either way I wasn’t defending his actions. Whether they were underage or not, he’s still well out of order and no one should be treated that way. He’s a scumbag.

    And with regards the 80s stuff, I agree. It’s not cool and it’s good that now people are turning their back on this behaviour and speaking up about it, I was just saying that I think people need to realise it’s something that a lot more people than just Jessie Lacey have done over the years. Hopefully for the next generation it is not something that is thrown at them as something they should strive to achieve. For mine I feel it was.
     
  9. littlejohn

    Prestigious Prestigious

    yeah different states have different ages here, but also 14 and 15, I don't know if those are legal ages of consent anywhere in the US.

    we have to set the precedent now in our scene that this is not acceptable, even when it comes to highly revered bands such as Brand New. if we do nothing about it now then there's no way that it changes for the next generation of bands.
     
  10. ComedownMachine

    Prestigious Prestigious

    I have little faith in the next generation of bands tbh. My local scene is pretty much entirely 23 year olds that go after high school girls
     
  11. Saephon

    Regular

    I don't know if you've already requested a refund or something, but one idea you could do is auction it off and donate the money to a charity for sexual abuse victims.
     
    bradpetrik likes this.
  12. littlejohn

    Prestigious Prestigious

    that's really sad.

    I'm not really involved in the scene, as I've been to like 5 shows in the past 4 years and 3 of them were Brand new, so I don't know anything about newer bands.
     
  13. bradpetrik

    Trusted Prestigious

    Goddamnit, nothing has changed.
     
  14. DeathOrGlory

    see ya

    Local music scenes, whether it be post- or pop-punk, EDM or metal, are just as gross as the big leagues for sure. Even if the abusers are run out of town, people will make excuses for them if their art was really good even if the abuser never owned up to bad behaviour or tried to make amends and grow in any way. My town has had its own Jesse Laceys, as miniscule in the grand scheme of things as they were, and people still defend them even after they've withdrawn from the scene.

    As far as Jesse is concerned, from the behaviour that has been documented, he is nothing more than a small, pitiful Man. For some reason I thought I could still hear the songs but I've had "Can't Get It Out" stuck in my head for the past hour and it just makes me sick. I hope he gets actual help and actually tries to do something right for a change instead of just pontificating on how broken he is like a gaslighter who has done this before. I hope the people he hurt can find some sense of healing now that the secret is out. I hope his family is doing ok. What a sad, stupid, sick man to idolize like I did. The more I think about this, the angrier I get.
     
  15. miltownrob

    Newbie Prestigious

    makes that line "god is love" sound a little different now.
     
  16. SuNDaYSTaR

    Regular

    You're actually thanking him while blatantly avoiding even mentioning his victims in all of this? You suck.
     
    elphshelf and AshlandATeam like this.
  17. Mrk_Brdshw

    Dusted Groove

    Sorry if this is too off topic for everyone...

    I actually have way more experience as far as playing with EDM acts than any other type of music, and although I've never seen anything sketchy like that going on at venues or festivals, it does weird me out how people treat popular acts like kings. I'm not even necessarily talking about the fans but more so the venues, staff, promoters, etc. I realize that's in their job, but at a certain point it gets weird.

    I've had experiences where my band wasn't allowed to bring in one male friend into the "backstage" area but then let literally any girl walk in from the street. Even a few weeks ago when we opened a show, I had to struggle to make it backstage to pack up my gear because they didn't want me bothering the main act. Then I was told that only the headliner could bring "escorts" backstage (I was with my girlfriend...) I then snuck around back and grabbed my guitar without anyone even seeing me...which bothered me even more because clearly that was not part of the staff's priorities. I don't know if anyone else cares, but after being around so many crews over the years who basically say "anything goes as long as the headliner is happy" makes me feel uneasy. I feel like it just adds to the mentality of people like this who think they can do/get away with whatever.
     
  18. DeathOrGlory

    see ya

    It absolutely does. Why expect consequences if you've never faced them and everyone thinks you're the best person in the world? High status people get away with things all the time in every kind of community because they seem untouchable and feel untouchable themselves.
     
  19. aoftbsten

    Trusted Supporter

    I think it's one of the biggest problems with all of this. Reading almost all of these "apologies" in the last month you get the feeling that all is forgiven if you just give out a forced "sorry". If forgiveness is expected, it essentially eliminates accountability and then this behavior persists.

    Maybe it's the pessimist in me, but I can already see the articles coming out 6-12 months from now profiling guys like Weinstein, CK, and Spacey, talking about how they've found inner piece, rehabilitated themselves and are now ready for a comeback.
     
  20. slimfenix182

    FUCKIN SAVAGES IN THAT FUCKIN BOX Supporter

    I certainly can't fault someone for pessimism but it really feels to me like those guys are done. I certainly hope you're wrong.
     
    aoftbsten likes this.
  21. aoftbsten

    Trusted Supporter

    I hope you're right. The sheer volume of allegations coming to light certainly seems to hint that real change is in the air.
     
    slimfenix182 likes this.
  22. JLBagnall

    Newbie

  23. Clark Nov 13, 2017
    (Last edited: Nov 13, 2017)
    Clark

    @yttebkralc Prestigious

    Wow. Emily Driskill.
     
  24. Felix Fidelis

    It's all rock & roll.