Death • Page 5

Just found out that a former co worker of mine passed away. She was such as sweet and caring person who worked really hard. Seemed like it happened so suddenly

 

One of the hardest things I went through this year was finding out one of my former coworkers died. It was thought to be suicide but now it seems that his GF killed him, just fucked up.

 

That's awful. My co worker passed from cancer, which looked like she was recently diagnosed with.

 

I lost my dad almost 2 years ago, so I feel you on this point. Not in a morbid way, but more in the logistical sense. "If X happened to me, what would it feel like? How would it affect others?"

The two-year anniversary of his death is in January and I am flying to Florida to be with my girlfriend's entire family for their annual "Festivus" party since they cannot all be together during the holidays. The anniversary is that same day. I dread being a depressing mess that day because when I get like that I just want to be alone and I will be around a good amount of strangers. I love and adore her family but it is going to be a struggle.

 

Damn, dude, I’m sorry to hear that. Yeah, that’s really unfortunate timing. I hate to suggest this, but do you have to go? Like is it just that one day or the weekend?

 

Full 4 day weekend (we are flying to Florida from Chicago). Luckily my girlfriend is fully aware of the date and it’s significance and will is ultra understanding.

 

I've never had to deal with anyone close to me dying so it's not a concept I have experience with or really know how to grasp. Ive known people who have died but we were distant enough that I don't think about it so my brain can think we just lost touch and I can tuck it away somewhere

Basically I feel like since I haven't rly had anyone super close to me die yet I'm going to absolutely lose it when someone does. Like when it's someone I can't just pretend I've fallen out of touch with. I've prob mentioned it in here already but I worry about my dad dying all the time. Idk why him specifically. Sometimes I get paranoid and think the reason I worry about him dying is because he's going to die in a sudden way and somehow I sense it. Idk it causes me legit anxiety sometimes even tho he's young and healthy. I feel like I need a therapist just for the fear of my dad dying because it sometimes keeps me up at night or I'll randomly cry thinking about it. When I was like 8 my sister told me about a dream she had where our dad died and I still remember it vividly. It might stem from being in a fatal car crash when I was a kid where my aunt died, but I often think of him dying in car crashes. Some days I randomly worry I'm going to get a call that he's in the hospital from a car accident. It's something I think about probably multiple times a week.

 

My heart is breaking. One of the people I take care of is on their time on earth. I didn’t think their time would have came this quickly. Terribly sad.

 

I don't like that that person is dying, but I do want to be supportive somehow through the internet

 

Unrelated, I gotta quit playing solitaire, its become an easy thing to do to pass time but I feel like its a waste of my consciousness at this point

 

It’s the downsides of my job. But at the end of the day when they go home to heaven they’re healed and no longer in pain.

 

I think about dying way too much lately. I don’t mean that I’m depressed or that I want to die, quite the opposite. I love life too much and the thought of not living and being able to spend time with friends and family terrifies me. I’m constantly thinking about when it’s gonna happen and cause one parent died of a heart attack and the other had one recently, I feel like I’m just waiting for my heart to give out, which probably isn’t a healthy way of thinking.

 

i used to have crazy death anxiety. thinking about my family and my own death. this year when i think of my own though, i'm just like "that sounds pretty nice." i guess i'd rather just be the first to go so i don't have to deal with the loss of loved ones. i really don't want to grow old and more and more alone. i feel alone enough as it is.

 

you could see about getting your heart monitored. you definitely have "family history of heart attack" :/

 

I just finished “Dead People Suck” By comedian Laurie Kilmartin. I cannot recommend it enough to anyone out there who has lost a parent. It is hysterical how she points out the absurdity of the hardships that come with such a loss and offers great advice along the way.

 

My team leader at my old job passed away recently. she was great. Such a ray of sunshine in that dump. Just a genuine person. I didn't think I'd rly be impacted because my brain just pretends they're on vacay or out in the world somewhere. But I keep thinking about her. She loves flamingos so I think of her when I see them. She threw a new year's party every year that I went to. She always wanted to see my apt but I never got to show her. I miss her and I didn't expect to.

 

Oh man I sent this dumb text to my best friend bitching and moaning basically and she resonds her dad has minutes, maybe hours. He stopped treatment (cancer) about 3 weeks ago.

Im sure she’s not bothered by it but obviously I feel dumb about it. Anyway, I told her “I love you” and she shares her location with me so I know she’s at her parents house so I told her “I’m just glad you’re there...I love you so much”


Do I need to say anything else? I will for sure be at whatever services they’ve decided on. I’ve never really dealt with anything like this. She’s 22.

 

I've been on the receiving end of this (your friend's position) and I promise it's only awkward for you as she has her mind on other things. That said - a simple "I am here if you need me" should suffice and be responsive is she reaches out.

 

When my dad died I felt like the less people tried to comfort me with words, the better. Cause even if they too have experienced death, it’s not the same and there is literally nothing you can say to make someone feel comforted. Sometimes I just liked having someone be there, even if it meant we weren’t talking or doing anything

 

Yeah I feel like what I said will suffice for now I will see her soon enough. Just sort of unsure like I said I have never really dealt with death.

 

Borderline ironic that I was in here giving grieving advice this morning because I just got a phone call saying that my grandma is probably going to pass tonight. She's been struggling with double pneumonia for the past few weeks, so it's been a matter of "when" for some time as 90 year olds rarely come back from it.

 

You ok?

 

My Lyft driver just talked about Sufism today because his dad suffered a stroke, then we talked about knowing all the rules to live a life told basically the same through so many religions but being able to take those thoughts and words and transform them into actions and reach any kind of enlightenment is such a constant struggle. Anyway I hope his dad is ok.

 

Thanks for asking. She passed peacefully last night and my family and I are doing fine, as this was expected. Funeral is Tuesday and I am helping my cousins get some of the affairs in order that my grandma didn’t already prepare herself the last year or so.

 

Damn. So sorry to hear that. Take care, man.