Astro 1ounge • Page 1294

I just had an ad for a massage chair, thanks you philistines

 

I miss being a teenager when I would have an over the top vulgar sense of humor bc it was ~shocking~ from a girl
Anyway if you ask me the squirt button and the pee button are way too close to each other

 

theres's gotta be an adult film called The Squirt Locker right

 

I’m only here to spread the gospel truth ok

 

i hope so cups

 

@ComedownMachine would know

 

CUPS

 

Especially if you have a cloaca

 

Well I learned something new today

 

Happy 3:11 3/11 east coasters.

 

Hey, I actually do know this one!

It does exist.

 

I hate that teaching you about duck holes is on brand for me

 

“IM a FiVe sTAr cUp iM a FiVe sTaR CUP”

 

“The Dragon movie... is that kids movie?”
“Uh, yeah”
“Well is it an action movie?”
“I think there’s some action. It’s definitely a kids movie.”
“Well what’s it about?”
“Uh... I think they train Dragons. There’s a lot of dragons.”
“What time is it at?”
“4”
“How full is it?”
“Like... 30%”
“How long is the movie?”

I fucking hate people

 

You can probably find out online
Siri play Imagine Dragons

 

You’d be amazed how many people just show up to the movies with no idea about what any movie even is

 

Probably not as surprised as I should be but it's still insane

The people who see movies based on good reviews only are the worst audiences

 

Every time Laura wants to see a movie with me, this is what I'm doing

There are so many movies I've seen now that I've had no idea about going in

 

Aeryn set up a Spotify account earlier and it makes you pick artists you like and she goes "oh I like Imagine Dragons" and I had to shame her

 

regretting getting custody?

 

Do you have Aeryn with you this week? Is it Spring Break here?