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Allegations of Sexual Misconduct by Ex-Real Estate Guitarist Detailed by Seven Women

Discussion in 'Article Discussion' started by Melody Bot, Oct 16, 2017.

  1. Melody Bot

    Your friendly little forum bot. Staff Member

    This article has been imported from chorus.fm for discussion. All of the forum rules still apply.

    Andy Cush, writing for Spin:


    In the months leading up to the publication of SPIN’s initial story, we spoke with multiple women who gave accounts of alleged sexual misconduct from Mondanile. In the following days, more women came to us with stories of his behavior. These on-the-record accounts, from seven women in total, largely involve allegations of Mondanile touching, kissing, and groping them without their consent. Two women alleged that Mondanile groped them while they were sleeping, and a third said that he did so while she was trying to sleep.

     
  2. justin.

    Trusted Supporter

    Is this why he is an ex member?
     
  3. SmithBerryCrunch Oct 16, 2017
    (Last edited: Oct 16, 2017)
    SmithBerryCrunch

    Trusted Prestigious

  4. Honeymagnolia

    Regular Supporter

    Sheesh. That is an awful read.
     
  5. Aaron Mook Oct 16, 2017
    (Last edited: Oct 16, 2017)
    Disgusted and pissed I ever spent money on his records.

    edit: not because I spent the money but because it went to him, I mean
     
    Contender likes this.
  6. cwhit

    still emperor emo Prestigious

    i am very upset that i was a big fan of his work but more importantly i'm very glad this is now well known so this shitty horrible dude will not be able to take any more victims. fuck this guy, i salute the bravery of all the victims for coming forward with this
     
    crunchprank likes this.
  7. Mrk_Brdshw

    Dusted Groove

    It's unfortunately unsurprising that every time something like this comes out, it's always TONS of women that have the same story. Like, the dudes who pull these types of things never feel remorse because they don't see these women as human beings, so they just keep doing it. Yuck.
     
  8. justin.

    Trusted Supporter

    Probably because it takes a sociopath to do this stuff.
     
  9. Malatesta

    i may get better but we won't ever get well Prestigious

    another day, another piece of shit guy
     
    AshlandATeam and crunchprank like this.
  10. cwhit

    still emperor emo Prestigious

    no, it doesn't. that's the problem.
     
    sawhney[rusted]2 and skogsraet like this.
  11. personalmaps

    citrus & cinnamon Supporter

    I have to counter this- plenty of otherwise “ordinary” people commit sexual assault. The culture we live in has unfortunately made many men feel entitled to women’s bodies and attention. It’s in every piece of media, in our politics, in our colleges, so on and so forth. I would love to just dismiss it as a problem of sociopathy, but the unfortunate truth is that it’s happening every day. When we take steps to recognize and combat the toxic culture that allowed this, we take steps to dismantling it- which means we have to admit the problem is deeper than a few bad apples.
     
    AshlandATeam, mercury, dylan and 7 others like this.
  12. justin. Oct 16, 2017
    (Last edited: Oct 16, 2017)
    justin.

    Trusted Supporter

    I never said that the one-and-done answer is being a sociopath. Why can’t it be that the toxic culture is also producing sociopaths, or easier for sociopaths to buy into it? Not all people who commit sexual assault show no remorse, but if they show no remorse or don’t view the victims are humans then then they are a sociopath by definition. The toxic culture has caused them to both commit sexual assault and become a sociopath.

    The post I replied to also asked why the guys don’t show remorse and not showing remorse is a very common characteristic found in sociopaths.

    In order to dismantle the toxic system you’ll have to know each and everything it does to people that buy into it and the various reasons why someone would buy into it.
     
  13. justin.

    Trusted Supporter

    The user I replied to asked why the guy seemed to show no remorse and didn’t see his victims as humans. That’s a very common characteristic of a sociopath. Unless we’re going to be selective with definitions and charateristics of sociopaths...
     
  14. cwhit

    still emperor emo Prestigious

    so are you calling a very large portion of men sociopaths? because many men end up abusing women and don't realize it's abuse and keep on doing it
     
  15. Malatesta

    i may get better but we won't ever get well Prestigious

    sociopathy implies a broad, pathological behavior set that is not necessarily present in all abusers. plenty of people are abusers, but are not considered sociopaths in their workplaces, churches, homes, etc.
     
    Jason Tate likes this.
  16. AshlandATeam and Aaron Mook like this.
  17. justin.

    Trusted Supporter

    I wouldn’t see anythjng wrong with saying that sociopathic actions are more common in men. You’re showing that if men think in the same ways as a sociopath then we shouldn’t classify them as one.

    Masculinity culture overlooks a lot of that and plays it off as mere innocence. And like I said above, I never said all males who commit sexual assault are sociopaths, many just share attributes.
     
  18. justin.

    Trusted Supporter

    For the....third time. I’m talking about guys who commit sexual assault and do not show remorse or see their victims as humans.
     
  19. cwhit

    still emperor emo Prestigious

    Not seeing victims as humans is different than remorse. Most cases of sexual assault have nothing to do with that. Was Harvey Weinstein a sociopath? Doubtful, he just had power and loved women and knew he could use that to get what he wanted
     
  20. justin. Oct 16, 2017
    (Last edited: Oct 16, 2017)
    justin.

    Trusted Supporter

    That’s why I put an “or” between them. 1) not showing remorse or 2) not see their victims as humans. Also, like I said, my reply to the guy dealt with both of the above. That’s why I mentioned sociopaths. I was speaking about guys who do all thee things (sexual assault someone, show no remorse, and view the victim as less than human).

    From what I know about Harvey, I’ll lean on your side right now that he had the power and took advantage of it. It is my personal opinion that he lacks a conscience, though.
     
  21. personalmaps

    citrus & cinnamon Supporter

    lots of men who aren't sociopaths don't really think of women as fully developed humans. it's why i have to have this conversation 20 times a month lmao. they don't have a conscience about it because they've been getting away with this behavior since the dawn of time. i think again that speaks more to the culture of toxic masculinity than it does to a pretty specific mental illness.
     
    AshlandATeam and Aaron Mook like this.
  22. zachmacD

    Trusted

    This is not a men problem. It's a problem some men have. I don't think you mean for it to come off this way, but when you say it's a "men problem" your distributing shame out to all men when really only a few should be the ones carrying it. I for one have no interest in carrying that burden. I've seen multiple guys on this site indirectly posting about having a complex simply because they're male and the "this is a men problem" mindset is the reason. If you assault women in any capacity, you're a piece of shit. No doubt about it. And I'm not saying that there aren't men out there who are assaulting women unaware that they have a messed up mindset. But there are a lot of men out there who are aware of the struggles women face and treat women with respect and as equals
     
  23. justin.

    Trusted Supporter

    Are those not characteristics of a sociopath, though? The google definition of sociopath includes the lack of a conscience.
     
  24. Fucking Dustin

    Chorus.fm Pokemon Draft League Reigning Champion Prestigious

    If that’s your takeaway from all this you’re part of the problem
     
  25. zachmacD

    Trusted

    and you're helping how? It's not my takeaway, but that's a takeaway that easily influenced guys on this site have. Saying this is a men problem is a huge generalization. I've been visiting absolutepunk/chorus for over 10 years now and I don't think a lot of posters, myself included, think about who may be reading what we post and not say anything. Between this, the Harvey Weinstein scandal, and the pop-punk guys that get called out every week, there's obviously an issue.