Discussion in 'Music Forum' started by OhTheWater, Nov 14, 2017.
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From name searching on twitter there are rumors of a case being brought against him
I'm sure some ppl blamed Taylor because ppl suck, but for the most part I don't recall that ppl did?? He was clearly a creep there and in many other instances. Dear John outlined the power imbalance and manipulation extremely well. The tweet says adult men dated Taylor when she was a teen. Are there other examples aside from John? Legit question cause idk. I recall her dating Jake g who I imagine is older than her but Im too lazy to Google their ages at the time oop
Jake G was like 30 and she was 22 roughly, so not exactly the same, and you're right I think that's it
but yeah John Mayer has said gross misogynistic and racist things
But honestly yes I'm so tired of adult men dating barely adult teens and since it's technically legal we're supposed to be okay with it. I struggle with that. Like with Hayley and Chad. People start arguing that u shouldn't take away the woman's agency but those large age gaps where the woman is like 18 or 19 are inherently toxic imo
Yeah I mean anyone defending John Mayer in any capacity has things to answer for above and beyond just how horrible he treated Taylor anyway.
yeah Jay and Bey and Hayley and Chad aren't romantic to me at all,my problem with the autonomy argument is that men are also making a choice in the scenario and that choice is to be creepy
Yeah tbh I don't recall ppl talking about Taylor and John much at all (could easily be misremembering tho) since I feel like Harry and Jake overshadowed that era dating wise but like... It's also a problem that relationship didn't get more critical attn. I'm judgy dgaf if it's technically legal. Known far too many women who've been in abusive situations with older men to think it's an anomaly.
Chad treated Hayley like shit for ten years after grooming her as a teenager on warped and I will never, ever forgive him or his stupid band.
Wait... Chad from NFG? Holy fucking yikes.
Not doubting you, just genuinely curious how you know this. Did I miss her speaking out on this somewhere?
I mean, he cheated on her multiple times, wrote songs about how her depression was such a drag for him, and her interviews during the AL cycle where he was brought up made it quite clear that he was a shitty partner. Plus, again, as a MARRIED ADULT MAN, he pursued a teenager on Warped Tour. If that happened now, y’all would be torch and pitchforks, but it happened in 2007 so we all let it slide. He’s currently dating someone even younger than Hayley so it seems like it’s just a cycle he’ll continue forever.
Sometimes, people don’t have to speak out- men just tell you who they are.
I got SO MUCH SHIT from people for mentioning how I felt a little uneasy about the the Hayley & Chad thing when it all started to be publicly known. It just felt a little gross when mentally combined with me witnessing a couple people interacting with him at Warped one year. Maybe 2002?
Not to sound like an oldish guy who existed back in the wild west (but here it comes): Something felt wrong as I watched a conversation between him and someone else but I didn't yet have the awareness of these things to understand the power dynamic at play. Nothing crazy and overt, but it definitely felt odd as a bystander.
I didn't follow any of it afterward. To hear the stuff personalmaps is saying is disappointing for the humans involved - I always hope people are good and aren't doing bad shit - but not a surprising conclusion.
Never liked Chad really
For real tho, the whole thing of Chad grooming her when she was a teenager is really gross looking back on it.
I'm 23 years old and I get queasy at the thought of myself or any of my same-age friends pursuing an 18-19 year old. Now ratchet that up 5 years, and add the part where he was already married? super super super extra fuckin weird
Here’s a wonderful interview with Hayley from January 2019, “on family, divorce and forgiving yourself”. hayley williams - l'odet
Attached some screen shots of Hayley talking about her marriage to Chad:
Damn, that’s pretty grim
He's dating someone from the YouTube acapella group Cimorelli (who I used to (and still am) be a huge fan of) and it's weird to think about. He's dating Lisa who is only 25, while he is 38. It's disgusting, but she probably doesn't realize how creepy it is.
Idk, I know I might get some beef for this, but I think there's a big difference between being 18 and 25. At 18 you're a legit teenager and nowhere near an adult. At 25 you're wayyy more mature and definitely an adult. Yes, the age gap is big, no denying that, but let's not patronize or ostracize her for it. This is purely anecdotal but I know a handful of couples with a 10+ year age gap and they're in healthy relationships. I know Chad is sketchy and has done sketchy stuff, I don't think it's fair to her to jump to conclusions if this relationship started under malicious intent.
I agree with this. Another thing to consider is that at 25 you're pretty much mentally fully developed. Part of what can make these relationships with one partner in their late teens and early 20s and another so much older so manipulative is the difference in mental growth. I'm not really so sure that that's an issue at 25 and 38.
This isnt meant to defend him. All the other stuff about Chad is gross, no denying that.
love that slip up of admitting it was “rightfully” accused like a champ