Accountability in Music • Page 322

Discussion in 'Music Forum' started by OhTheWater, Nov 14, 2017.

  1. sonder

    eat my shorts, jabronis

    As a non-insider on the scene (if you will), I’d rather not have the thread scattered across different threads.

    It’s been an invaluable resource: a lot of times there’s no other way I would have heard about bad and sometimes horrible decisions that artists I support make.

    What’s more, it’s made me a lot more aware—and therefore critical of—the pedestals that artists are placed on, and the inordinate amount of power over others that gives them.

    And I’ve said this once before, I am seriously grateful to the Women in here who take time out of their day to explain important issues to others. Reading your replies, I think/hope, has helped me learn a great deal.

    Anyways FYI there is someone out here listening (even if I don’t chime in often) and thinks this thread, for all its ups and down, can be and often is a valuable resource to have around.

    My two cents for what it’s worth.
  2. Dinosaurs Dish

    an oak tree

    Wherever this threads goes, I’ve learned a lot from it. I’ve said some super shitty stuff here and “in real life” that I regret and this is one of the threads I actively think about and feel I’ve learned from. I hope it continues to be a resource for people like me who needed a reality check and learn.
  3. Kiana

    Goddamn, man child Prestigious

    I like this thread having discussion but I also missed whatever happened a few pages back so my opinion might not mean much! There seems to be disagreement on this, but for the most part I think the majority of users in this thread come from good faith and wanting to discuss, and I like hearing from the other women who are more involved in the scene than myself. The thought of having to go into the individual band threads to read discourse and then contend with a bunch of defensive rando fans of the artist is.... Unpleasant to me lol but I'd survive either way
    Omni, Aregala, ImAMetaphor and 3 others like this.
  4. supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    I think people were just saying that posts that are along the lines of “I miss this band and am having a hard time putting them to rest” belong in the thread of the band, and not this kind of thread.

    But maybe I should just speak for myself because that’s what *I* was saying lol

    Edited to add: however I also think a thread that was designed for us to work through our feelings (like a kind of support group thread) would be the better alternative to making this thread about ourselves. Anytime someone says something about how accusations affect them, people (rightfully) respond that this is about the victim. So maybe this thread should be focused on the artist, the accusations, and the apology/reparations/accountability (lol dreaming big here). And maybe we make another thread that *is* for us to “make about ourselves” and focuses on sorting through our own feelings about it.

    I dunno. Probably not a perfect suggestion but idk
  5. Tom

    It's way too late, or much too early Prestigious

    Honestly as a 21 year old white dude, I’ve learned a lot from this thread and it’s helped me understand why accountability is so important. I don’t post much in here but I read almost every post because I know accountability is so damn important. So to the users who are constantly updating this thread and letting people know what’s going on in the scene or just music in general, THANK YOU.
  6. Jake W

    Golf Story > RDR2 Supporter

    If only every man in the music scene was Frank Carter

  7. Stephen Young

    Regular Prestigious

    love frank carter. seeing gallows in '07 back when he used to do the set from the middle of the pit was *the* moment I connected with punk,etc. I remember him personally pushing away those big shirtless hardcore dudes so smaller people could have fun and grab the mic, and that was really cool to me. that was also probably the first time I was in a pit where there were as many women as men, and it was overall just a super cool experience and it's awesome to watch him keep doing stuff like that on a 1000x bigger scale
  8. y2jayjk

    Trusted Supporter

    fuck tool btw.

    May have gotten a friend who never heard about that stuff re evaluate everything he thought about them now. So that's positive.
    sonder, incognitojones and Ken like this.
  9. Anna Acosta

    Listen to Staircase Spirits. Moderator

    I've struggled with this. A lot.

    I'm gonna be real - I don't know how to respond to a lot of this. Because as much as I agree there has been a lot of toxic direct-to-anger speech in these threads from people who have a lot of privilege which I wish would change, I also don't see how to differentiate that from firm correctional speech from people like myself/tone policing based on what has been said here. I will die on the hill that if you give privileged people an out with the way you address a topic, they'll take it. If not doing that makes my approach toxic, then I don't belong here. And fine, maybe thats true.

    I'm sure there are survivors made uncomfortable by the discourse. I'm sorry for that, and they should be heard. But. There are also survivors made uncomfortable by what's happened in here for the past few pages, myself included. If the people I'm asked to consider when discussing these issues are first and foremost folks who need their hands held while they figure out how to deal with liking bands with abusers in them, I just have no interest. I have those same struggles. I'm not gonna name the bands because I don't need anyone to tell me it's oh-fucking-kay that those bands still matter to me. My struggle isn't as important as the people it might hurt. I agree that there should be a place for people to explore that grief - I'd even participate - but I'm not interested if the purpose is to tell people they shouldn't experience guilt regarding that. It isn't realistic. (And I don't care what people intended for us to be discussing here. This is the discourse I've seen that's actually HAPPENED. I also work 100x harder than I want to in order to give the benefit of the doubt and to be rational/non-emotional/explain things yet my posts still easily fall under the "toxic" parameters I've seen discussed here.)

    So, I guess my thesis here is I don't know. You can't please everyone. People learn when they're ready to. My tone won't change that. I am a very rational person who prioritizes what works over what feels good, every time. I'm not perfect, and I slip up. I also acknowledge nobody called me out here (edit 2: I'm saying this bc I got name-dropped more than once, however), but when we're dealing with emotional trauma we're no longer dealing with rationality. We're in the realm of feelings. And honestly this has just made me feel like nothing I do here actually matters. So if what I do is toxic and unwanted, it and I will go. I'll never stop doing this work. It's part of me. But I have my own mental health to consider and forgoing nuance in the other extreme doesn't help either - and with all due respect, that's a lot of what's happened here.

    There's a fine line between asking for multi-faceted conversations and tone-policing and most of y'all didn't find it, and nobody pays me to be here.


    Someone who was privy to both conversations.

    Edit; I'll check in next week. Idk what'll happen after that but I'm not gonna cut my nose off to spite my face. I'm too old for this.
  10. DrAlanGrant

    Texas Forever

    If this is out of line I’ll delete it but I hope your tone never changes. You have been an inspiration countless times.
    RazorCrusade, Mary V and Brother Beck like this.
  11. supernovagirl

    Poetic and noble land mermaid

    @Anna Acosta we love you & will never be worthy of the work you do honestly. However frequently you feel able to contribute is cherished and taken seriously. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. You are appreciated beyond measure by some of us here, I hope you know that.
  12. ImAMetaphor

    so much I think Prestigious

    I want to thank the people, particularly women like Anna, who have shared their perspective so far. I let myself take up too much space in the conversation over the past few days, and after this post, I’m going to sit back, observe, and listen for a while before I post in this thread again. I want to do and be better, and that process is messy. Sometimes, I think I’m fighting for a good thing when, in reality, I’m letting my privilege, bias, personal anxiety, and lack of experience cloud my judgement. So, thank you to everyone who does the work. I know it’s exhausting, but it’s doing so much good, even if that isn’t always visible.
    tyramail likes this.
  13. ItsAndrew


  14. tyramail

    Trusted Supporter

    Pierce The Veil are teasing new music. They’ve blocked me on
    Instagram for asking if they were going to just pretend those allegations against Mike didn’t exist. So fuck them and fuck the “allegations ruin careers” bullshit.
    solxace, ItsAndrew, Mary V and 3 others like this.
  15. iCarly Rae Jepsen

    I was walking with a ghost Supporter

  16. SaveTheEarth

    Lucipurr Supporter

  17. Anthony_

    A Dork Prestigious

    Ken likes this.
  18. tdlyon

    Pawnee Forever Supporter

  19. SaveTheEarth

    Lucipurr Supporter

    Ah, didn't know there was another one.
    Anthony_ likes this.
  20. Anthony_

    A Dork Prestigious

  21. ItsAndrew


    Someone in a Facebook group I am in said that Hobo Johnson can’t play his hometown anymore due to multiple sexual assault allegations. Have any of you heard anything about this?
  22. tshreve


    I heard about that well over a year ago, it seemed to get forgotten about extremely fast
  23. ItsAndrew Sep 5, 2019
    (Last edited: Sep 5, 2019)


    Hearing that reminded me that I also read something about this (part of it, since apparently there are multiple allegations) a year ago (these screenshots are from a year ago, in a different Facebook group I am in).



  24. Kiana

    Goddamn, man child Prestigious

    Omg just earlier today someone was telling me they're taking their daughter to their show and I was like I have no idea who that is??? But apparently that's for the best???
  25. SaveTheEarth

    Lucipurr Supporter

    Talking about James leaving the get up kids. It's on Reddit and nothing direct from any survivors yet, but the accounts do have merit.

    Screenshot_20190908-055316.png . Screenshot_20190908-055327.png Screenshot_20190908-055405.png Screenshot_20190908-055424.png