Accountability in Entertainment • Page 429

Well this sucks, I always thought of him as one of the most genuine people in music

 

Who tf is “we”

he speaks for everyone in that situation?

 

feels like one of those situations that should just have remained private.

 

For me it always depends on how whoever was wronged feels. Cheating is abuse and if the victim wants to drag a cheater go for it. But tabloids breaking personal stories always feels a little gross. Here I might be missing something but it does seem like Grohl put this out without anyone mentioning it or asking?

 

cheating is abuse???

maybe i’m being naive but that seems like a bit of a stretch

 

Cheating isn’t always abuse but especially serial cheating/abuse of trust can absolutely be emotionally abusive/manipulative.

 

yeah i mean we don’t know any of the details of their marriage/relationship, and nor should we, so it seems like a bit of a jump given the actual announcement. but fair enough.

 

Does cheating really belong in an accountability thread? It really starts to feel like puritanism. I don't know why he announced it (maybe he was trying to get ahead of a reporter already having the story) but it is something between the parties involved.

 

to be clear, not trying to carry water for him. he seems like a shitty partner and i feel bad for his daughter, touring with him and feeling like she had to shut down her personal accounts after this. but i don’t think we need to make it more than that.

 

Right I’m not calling Dave Grohl an abuser, I don’t know him. I don’t think the word “accountability” in these threads is necessarily about actually holding someone accountable broadly, since none of us can do that. I just see these threads as places where people can work through whatever “accountability” issues arise/decide for themselves how they personally want to go forward.

 

Cheating can be abusive but I don’t think it always is. A one off one night stand is just shitty. It starts to turn abusive when the gaslighting gets involved, lying about potential STI exposure, etc. Cheating on its own doesn’t belong in this thread imo

 

It's also the wrong subforum

 

Cheating can be a one off mistake but typically it involves deceit or worse which can venture well into emotional abuse. In general I choose to think of it as abuse and no one is saying all abuse is the same or deserves the same outrage. There’s been a lot written on the topic if you’d like to go read it. I’d just encourage people not to be so incredulous when someone says cheating is abuse because it’s definitely not a crazy thing to say in the field of psychology and that kind of response can be hurtful and dismissive of someone else’s trauma.
I also was responding to general statements about whether these types of things should just stay private just to say for me if you get cheated on and want to make it public have at it, you shouldn’t be shamed for that or told to keep it private imo. But otherwise publicizing this stuff does feel wrong.

 

I use this thread to keep track of people who've said or done shitty things, and cheating certainly counts. I don't know what "accountability" would look like in this situation, but I think the fact that my perception of Grohl has changed is something at least

But yeah, this isn't the Music Forum, your princess is in another castle

 

Music is entertainment, guys.

 

Cheating is absolutely emotional abuse in my eyes. Zero sympathy for cheaters, unless it's someone stuck in an abusive relationship with no way out

 

Yeah cheating is shitty as fuck

 

truly feel for all the kids, both their parents suck shit

 

Fuck both parents and damn the years have not been kind to Kate judging by that pic. It's like she aged 30 years since the show sheesh.

 

Can't believe the guy who deliberately dressed like his co-star's abuser to harass her isn't a good dude.

 

Fuck him but lol after a very intense scene in the Minecraft movie