I saw these kind of posts on r/dataisbeautiful so I thought I'd make my own. In conclusion, Tinder sucks.
You obviously don't know 3 year olds. I thought newborn was bad, bad now has a new tier specifically for 3 year olds
I have three nephews (3,6,10) honestly have all been different at the age of 3 (good and bad), favorite is probably when the older two were around 5, but I do like the 10 year old being older because he is able to keep himself occupied and helps the family with small tasks when asked. Personally I felt like I never wanted kids (money, unable to do things I could without one), but as I get older I definitely think I want at least one. My SO And I have discussed it into detail but ideally we both want to wait a few more years (so we can travel, independence, save money)
i have more fear about having kids now than i ever have but it's more about my fear of failing as a father. part of it is about having my own time too but that's not true at the end of the day because i already have none and never will. between work, pursuing better health, and family and friends i get one maybe two hours per work day and half a day per weekend where i am actually free. seriously. if i had a kid i would have MORE time. babies get you out of so much shit. we already rarely go on dates because we are cheap and we do one vacation a year. we would have more home time and when i imagine us taking turns to cuddle the kid and get it to sleep it sounds wonderful. id still get my video games and whatever. my biggest block is im afraid i will be a terrible father. ill crash the car and the baby will die, i take my eye off the kid for a minute and they'll be horribly injured somehow. or ill just have no patience and get too angry too often. idk. these are my daddy issues manifesting big time but if i were to be a good dad, id be the first good dad in the last three generations of my family, so yeah. the biggest reason i DO want kids is because raising them with Fiona would he amazing. she has a degree in early childhood development and anytime she is around a baby or child i just melt. it would be an honor to see her do that with her own child and get to share the experience with her. we dont see it happening for ar least 2 or 3 more years though.
thank you dude yeah i bet, im not exactly excited to punch my card for 18 years of massive anxiety haha
True, I just have a lot of friends who had kids middle 20s/late 20s so compared to them I feel like I am starting late. lol
No matter how much you prepare to be a parent, you often are just gonna learn by experience and as you go. You’ll make mistakes and fuck up here or there but that just comes with the territory.
Yep. NOTHING and no one can prepare you for parenting other than being a parent. Every baby is different, every experience is different and every single thing is new and happening to you for the first time. Kind of laughable when people say stuff like ‘oh, spend more time with kids to see if you like kids.’ ummm, no. That doesn’t prepare you for anything whatsoever. Also, quite normal to have fears or anxiety about being a bad parent or not doing things the ‘right’ way. I’m a full blown worrier, have been my entire life. It’s even worse with kids now. Anxiety is always sky high. I’m constantly thinking or feeling something is wrong or something bad will happen. When I was a kid, my dad used to joke that he hadn’t slept well since my oldest sister was born and I thought he was joking but now that I’m a parent I’m pretty sure he was being serious. Even once your past the ‘baby is up all night’ stage I still have trouble sleeping well with just constant thoughts or worries. Anyway, if THAT doesn’t sell you on wanting kids, I’m not sure what will.
I have a crush on a co-worker and it sucks so much because she has a boyfriend. I think the only reason I developed it was because we basically hang out all the time at work. It’s gotten to a point where she used to go out to her car to talk to her boyfriend but now she wants to stay inside and talk to me. She has also made some flirty comments to me and I just try and ignore it now. I’m hoping I can just ignore it and it will go away. I’ve told some friends everything she has done with me and they alll say I’m stepping into an area I shouldn’t be at so I think I’m going to chill for a bit.
Haha my parents always told me the same thing about sleep. But you learn that sleep, and other things that you used to love to do, aren't quite as important as they were anymore and that doing things your kids enjoy makes you just as happy, if not happier, than doing whatever those things were. That said, making time for a hobby or "me time" are very important to sanity.
The thought of pushing a large object out of my vagina sounds about the worst it can get. That's like.... Pushing out something that weighs more than a bag of flour. Out of a very small area. No thanx. Whenever men are like I want a big family! Like six kids! I'm like yeah I bet u do